


Tangled Up In Blue

by sparkinside (boomersoonerash)



Category: Hanson (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Not Related, Alternate Universe - Twins, Arguing, Bathroom Sex, Blow Jobs, Blow Jobs in a Car, Brother/Sister Incest, Come Marking, Crushes, Cunnilingus, Drunken Flirting, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Feelings, Flirting, Friendship, Incest, Masturbation, Morning Kisses, Morning Sex, Mutual Masturbation, Neck Kissing, Oral Sex, Pining, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Sibling Incest, Sisters, Smut, Tension, Twins, Unrequited Crush, Vaginal Fingering, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2019-10-04 16:45:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 38,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17308172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boomersoonerash/pseuds/sparkinside
Summary: Avery has loved Zac most of her life, there is only one problem. One really big problem, Zac loves her twin sister Tess but that isn't new for her. What is new is the fact that Zac's brother Taylor keeps inserting himself in her life when all she really wants to do is be miserable about the fact that Zac is now dating Tess.Of course things never go as one plans and Avery's life is about to get a whole lot of complicated.





	1. I Can't Really Help It If My Tongue's All Tied In Knots

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Avery did her best not to glare as she sat in a booth at the diner where her sister worked and where she herself got her shitty coffee fix.

Coffee being the only lifesaver she had as a struggling art student who was known to pull an all nighter or two.

Her glare though wasn't on her sister. Her glare was on the boy who was at the counter flirting with her sister. A boy she wanted to give her affection and flirt with her. But he never had in all their years of being friends since middle school, he had never shown Avery the type of affection that he showed Tess.

Tess was the girl of his dreams it seemed or that was what Zac always waxed political to her about every time he could. Since all he saw Avery as was his best friend.

It was almost annoying because Avery really didn't need to know that Zac sometimes woke up with morning wood to thoughts of her twin sister.

Her identical twin sister which again Avery didn't get why Zac couldn't just like her, like he did Tess? She was basically Tess minus her personality was a bit darker, while Tess had always been bubbly and cheery.

"You zoned out again," Norah spoke from beside Avery and Avery blushed as she turned to look at her roommate. "But it's okay. I know seeing Zac fawn over your sister is your weak spot," she shrugged with a playful smile.

Avery raising her hand to flip Norah off.

"It's not my weak spot," she protested knowing her words sounded like a lie even to herself. "I just don't get why Zac is in love with Tess. Underneath her bubbly, cheery, hippie persona she's not that fun to be around. Trust me I've been stuck with her for twenty years and still am," she muttered because the reality of the situation was, besides Norah, Tess was her other roommate.

The world not ready to let her part from a twin she was envious of because she wanted the affections of the boy who wanted her sister.

A sister she did love despite everything.

Norah snorted, "Beats me either but then again I've never gotten boys and their minds. It's probably why I am a lesbian," she shrugged nonchalantly. "Does Tess even like Zac though? I mean she's never really said one way or another."

"File that under the list of things Tess and I don't ever talk about," Avery answered as she glanced back up at Tess and Zac.

Feeling a tiny piece of her heart break at the look Zac was giving Tess. It was a look Avery wanted to be on the receiving end of one day.

"Can we go though?" Avery asked as she made to stand from the booth. "I have class soon and I really don't want to be late again."

"Sure, sure," Norah said as she too stood up. Linking her arms with Avery's. "I forgot that under all your broodiness you really a goody goody at heart," she teased and her words healed Avery's heart just a tiny bit.

A small fraction of a bit.

*****

"Ah just the girl I was looking for Pippi Longstockings," a voice came from beside Avery and she didn't have to even turn her head to see who it was.

Knew it from the way he spoke and the way an arm slumped around her shoulders. Like Avery wasn't trying to mind her own business or anything as she walked across the college campus after leaving her class for the day.

Glaring again for what felt like the thousandth time Avery did turn her head to see Taylor beside her. Zac's older brother, a boy who she was sure she had loathed from the minute she had met him all those years back.

"Shush it with the nickname," she told him knowing it was one he always used when she had her hair in braided pigtails. "But why were you looking for me?" she asked him not sure what business he had looking for her.

Again besides having Zac in common they weren't really friends. Even if somehow Taylor kept butting into her friend group. Kept showing up every Friday night when Avery, Tess, Norah, Zac, and Zac's roommate Gage all went out to bars or to the movies or somewhere to eat.

"Because I'm having a party this Friday," Taylor told her like she cared. "And I want you to relay the invite to Norah if she wants to come."

"My sister isn't invited either?" Avery questioned with a raised eyebrow. Moving to take Taylor's arm off her shoulder finally. 

"She would be if I knew she didn't have other plans already," Taylor spoke casually. "Zac's finally broken her and she agreed to go on a date with him."

Stopping in her tracks, Avery paused at Taylor's words, watching as Taylor who had taken a few more steps before realizing she had stopped, froze in his own tracks. His body turning to face her as he looked her over. Avery hoping that he couldn't see how hurt she felt.

That she felt like crying right now but she wouldn't. Not yet.

"They have a date?" Avery asked her voice soft and there was a slight crack to it. A crack that again she prayed Taylor didn't notice.

The last thing she wanted was for him to know she had a crush on Zac. She'd never hear the end of it she felt.

Taylor's face contorted some as he stepped closer to her. His hand going to rest on her shoulder. "Are you okay?" he asked her showing more concern than she'd seen out of him in her whole life which was a bit jarring.

Taylor never cared about her and she never cared about him. They were always antagonizing each other.

"I'm fine," Avery lied thankful that her voice sounded stronger now. "I just am shocked that Zac finally broke Tess down."

Taylor gave her a look that Avery knew said he didn't believe her words but he just shook his head, removing his hand from her shoulder. "He was bound to one day," he said deciding to go along with Avery's lie.

"He is a Hanson," Avery said as she finally began to walk again. Taylor staying in step as he walked with her. "Isaac always says you Hanson's get everything you want," she told him mentioning the eldest of three Hanson boys.

If she wasn't fond of Taylor she felt indifference to Isaac, mainly due to the bigger age difference. But also because while she hated to admit it, she found him boring. Talking to him was like talking to a wall sometimes. 

Then again all he talked about was sports and sometimes occasionally politics.

"Isaac is wrong in that statement," Taylor sighed bringing Avery out of her thoughts. Her head cocking to look at the boy beside her.

His face almost unreadable as he turned to look at her too.

"We don't always get everything we want."

Falling silent Avery continued to eye Taylor for much longer than she cared to admit. Knowing in the pit of her stomach there was more to his words. She just didn't want to ask him because she didn't want a heart to heart with Taylor. It was on the last of things she ever wanted to do in her entire life.

"You know," Avery started though before she could stop herself. "You could have any girl you want," she said assuming his words were about a female. After all they had just been talking about Zac and his pursuit of Tess. "I mean you get laid at every party you attend and you have girls constantly throwing themselves at you."

Taylor rolled his eyes as he shook his head, "You know I'm more than a sex god right?" he asked with a hint of amusement. "I mean I love sex and I love getting laid but I don't...none of those girls is the one I want to settle down with," he shrugged as a blush coated his cheeks. "But I'm grateful you're thinking of my sex life there Pippi."

"I wasn't...I'm not..." Avery started as she once again stopped walking. Her cheeks now as pink as Taylor's had been seconds ago. "I've never entertained the idea of your sex life before," she finally got out.

Watching as Taylor shot her a wink, "That's what they all say," he whispered before leaning in and leaving a featherlight kiss on her cheek. "This is where we part ways though," he said before moving away from her. "But consider the party this Friday...and maybe come to the coffeehouse tonight," he added on in a hurry. "It's open mic night and I swear I need one of my friends there so that you guys can see that I do actually know how to sing and I'm not just talking out of my ass."

Opening her mouth to decline his offer, Avery was surprised when no words came out of her mouth. A fact she reckoned was due to the kiss on the cheek that Taylor had given her because it had been unexepected and again it went against everything that they were to each other.

They were enemies or at the least people who put up with each other for the sake of one other person and people like that. They didn't kiss on cheeks.

*****

Chewing on her lip as she stepped inside of the coffeehouse, Avery was almost regretting her decision to come. Almost, at least until she spotted Taylor sitting in a chair having a conversation with Zac, who was seated across from him on a couch.

Some of the regret fading away even if the sight of seeing Zac opened the wound from earlier today. A wound she had polished over with tons of tears once she had gotten back to her apartment after her classes were done.

Taking a deep breath, she chewed her lip a bit harder before walking over to where Zac and Taylor where. Sitting down beside Zac softly. Her presence making both of them turn to look at her.

Taylor looking almost delighted while Zac looked confused.

"I'd told you she'd come," Taylor spoke with a gleeful tone. "I think you owe me twenty bucks now Zachary."

"Twenty bucks?" Avery asked as she raised an eyebrow. Feeling surprised as well as confused at Taylor's first words spoken since she came.

"We had a bet," Zac answered sheepishly. "Taylor said on Monday that he betted he could get you to come tonight and I told him he couldn't," he revealed.

Avery not sure why she felt angry right now but she was. She was angry and she felt a bit used.

"So I'm just a bet to you now?" she asked with a bit of heat on her words.

"Of course not Pippi," Taylor spoke this time not even giving Zac time to talk. "I mean if you were just a bet I would have done more than just asked you to come," he shrugged as he caught her eye.

Avery hating the way it felt like Taylor was looking through her and into her soul.

Glaring at Taylor, Avery remained silent, hoping Zac would say something. Anything would do but of course he didn't. He just remained silent beside of her.

Taylor smirking slightly before tearing his gaze off of Avery as he stood up, "Well, I'll just leave you two alone now. Need to drink some caffeine courage before I go up and perform," he said and before either Zac or Avery could protest Taylor had wandered off.

As if he had never even been standing there in the first place.

"You're not a bet to me," Zac said a little too late and Avery turned to him with a glare still on her face. "It's true Avie," he said as he scooted a bit closer to her. "You're my best friend."

"If I was your best friend, I'd be way more than just a twenty buck bet," Avery retorted her glare lessening some. "I'd be worth at least a hundred," she told him listening as he let out a chuckle.

His shoulders loosening some. Avery not even realizing he had been tense but it seemed he had been.

Maybe he had been afraid she was angrier than she really had been.

"Yeah and I'd be broke too if that was the case," Zac said with a shake of his head. "But god what did my brother do to get you to come?" he questioned like he didn't believe what Taylor said.

Like he expected Taylor to have done more than just ask her. Which well, Taylor usually would have especially if it meant him winning money. So, she wasn't sure why he hadn't.

"He didn't do anything," Avery answered as she scrunched up her nose. "He just asked and I guess it worked," she told him not even sure herself why that had worked.

What had changed this time to make her want to come?

"But let's not tell him that," Avery continued. "His head will grow and he'll think all he has to do from now on is just ask and we'll come to things. Sometimes it's nice to make Taylor put in a little effort," she said and again Zac chuckled because taking the piss out of Taylor was one of his favorite past times.

Then again Taylor was good at doing that too.

After that though, the conversation between her and Zac shifted off Taylor. The both of them talking about various things, most of it probably would have been boring to other people but Avery never found any conversation with Zac boring. Not like she did with Isaac.

She was also glad that for once the conversation didn't go to her sister. Because the last thing she really wanted to hear was Zac confirming what Taylor had told her. That he had a date with Tess on Friday.

Their conversation only really came to an end once Taylor eventually took the makeshift stage. Avery raising an eyebrow at the guitar he had. Because while she knew he boasted of his singing ability he kept mum on the guitar playing. She had just always assumed that was Isaac's thing while Zac's was drums.

All the Hanson boys being gifted, so honestly she never doubted Taylor's music ability. So again she was stumped on why she had come here tonight.

"So, he can really sing?" Avery asked in a whisper as she briefly chanced a glance at Zac who just nodded his head.

Avery falling silent after that as Taylor started strumming the guitar after a brief introduction. Avery letting her gaze stay on Taylor as he strummed a familiar tune. Some old nineties song she had heard more than once in her life.

_Did you see the sky?_  
_I think it means that we've been lost_  
_Maybe one last time is all we need_  
_I can't really help it_  
_If my tongue's all tied in knots_  
_Jumping off a bridge is just the farthest_  
_That I've ever been_

After the first bit had been sung, Avery felt a blush build up on her cheeks when Taylor who had searched the small crowd seemed to zero in on her gaze.

Avery swearing she had never felt so naked, so exposed, so seen through as he continued to sing. As if he was trying to send her a message and she had yet to put the puzzle pieces together or to find them all just yet.

_Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down_  
_Anyplace but those I know by heart_  
_Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down_  
_I'll follow you down, but not that far_

_I know we're headed somewhere_  
_I can see how far we've come_  
_But still I can't remember anything_  
_Let's not do the wrong thing_  
_And I'll swear it might be fun_  
_It's a long way down_  
_When all the knots we've tied have come undone_

Avery bit down on her lip softly as she chanced a look over to Zac, wondering if he was noticing the way Taylor was staring at her. Almost wanted to ask him about it to make sure she wasn't going crazy. But when she turned to face Zac she couldn't help the frown that settled on her lips when she saw him preoccupied on his phone.

Hated the thought that he was probably texting Tess. Her damn twin sister who he was unknowingly breaking her heart with.

Shaking her head she turned back to face Taylor. Her blush growing when she saw a faint smirk on his lips as he went to finish the rest of the song.

Avery making a mental note to leave as soon as the song was done. Both Hanson brothers were getting on her nerves for various reasons tonight it seemed.

_Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down_  
_Anyplace but those I know by heart_  
_Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down_  
_I'll follow you down, but not that far_

_How you gonna ever find your place_  
_Running in an artificial pace_  
_Are they gonna find us lying face down in the sand_  
_So what the hell now we've already been forever damned_

_Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down_  
_Anyplace but those I know by heart_  
_Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down_  
_I'll follow you down, but not that far._

*****

Avery who had almost drifted off to sleep, opened her eyes when she felt her phone which was laying beside her on the bed vibrate. 

Reaching out for it against her better judgement she saw a message notification and clicked it. Again knowing she shouldn't. She should be sleeping but she feared all her dreams tonight would be filled with dreams of Zac and Tess and she didn't want that.

She already had to deal with that in real life.

 **T-bird 2:58**  
Thanks for coming to my show Pippi ;).

 **Avery 3:02**  
You could have texted me this at a normal hour Taylor...we're not even friends and you're making me regret that you even have my number or that I have yours.

 **T-bird 3:07**  
You wound me with your words. You must need your coffee.

 **Avery 3:09**  
What I need is sleep and someone who I dislike to leave me be so I can get it.

 **T-bird 3:12**  
Fine, have it your way Pippi. But know I plan to be your best friend before this year is done. We can even be a duo with cool nicknames. I'll be Jaded Musician cause of the music thing and you can be Jealous best friend cause you know of the Zac and Tess thing.

Reading Taylor's last text, Avery swore her heart had nearly stopped beating in her chest. Hating that apparently he could see right through her too. 

Everyone but Zac could see through her it seemed..and well Tess but she and Tess while close had never been to read each other. Not like most other twins could and Zac it seemed was just damn oblivious.

 **Avery 3:18**  
Fuck off..btw Jealous and Jaded is not a good combo for two people to be as friends. So it's good we never will be.


	2. Every Heart Is A Package Tangled Up In Knots Someone Else Tied

Looking up from the painting she had been doing, Avery eyed Tess who was standing in her doorway. "Is there something you want?" she asked trying to keep her tone normal even if she was a bit bitter.

Today was the day that Tess was going out with Zac and Avery's emotions had been all haywire. It was one reason she was currently painting. She had nervous energy that she needed to get out by being creative.

At least that's what she always told herself since this was a coping mechanism all the time for her when things went shitty in her life.

"I was umm..." Tess started as she looked away from Avery as if she was afraid to say whatever she needed to say. Something that irritated Avery slightly. "I was wondering if I can borrow one of your outfits tonight?" she asked as she finally looked up. "I've got nice ones but I'm not sure Zac will like whatever I choose from mine."

Rolling her eyes Avery didn't move from where she was standing in front of her easel. "I'm pretty sure Zac would love whatever you wore," she told her sister.

Half wanting to add on Zac would also love it if Tess went naked as well. But she kept that to herself.

There were some sarcastic quips that just weren't right or would cause too much drama or explanations and the naked one was surely one of those.

"Maybe so but I don't feel like he...just I know he likes your outfit and clothes," Tess sighed like she wasn't sure how to explain her apprehension about her own clothing. "Please Avie."

"Fine," Avery relented as she put down her paintbrush. Running a hand through her hair, not even caring that she probably now had red paint in her hair. "Do you know where Zac is taking you?" she questioned as she walked to the closet. "That way I know what type of outfit or clothes to get you."

"The movies and then out to eat," Tess answered as she walked farther into Avery's room.

Turning her back to her sister as she opened her closet, Avery once again rolled her eyes because if it was just a movie and dinner date she wasn't sure why Tess was freaking out with her outfit choices.

Then again maybe that was one thing were they differed vastly.

Avery just never really seemed to care what she wore and she doubted she'd be freaking out over what to wear on a date with Zac. She'd known Zac long enough that she was sure he'd seen her in every occasion except naked.

Though if he ever had sex with Tess she reckoned then he'd see her naked. Sort of...maybe.

She was sure she and Tess had to differ there too some or at least she hoped. But these weren't thoughts she wanted to be having.

Not when she felt sick at the idea of Zac having sex with Tess.

Grabbing a blue shirt with black stripes out of her closet Avery turned around. Pausing when she saw her sister eyeing the painting she had been doing.

It was just something easy really. The ocean at sunset.

"You see something wrong with my painting?" Avery asked getting her sister's attention then. Not missing the blush on Tess's cheeks.

Tess shook her head as she looked at Avery almost in awe. A look Avery wasn't used to getting from her sister.

"No, just wishing I was as artistic as you," Tess told her as she moved away from the painting. Her eyes landing on the shirt in Avery's hand.

Avery holding it out wordlessly for her sister to take. Just like she was letting her sister take Zac from her too.

"You should be able to wear some of your jeans with it," Avery told her deciding to keep to herself that Zac had said the shirt on her made her look cute.

It was something she wanted to keep for herself since Tess was taking everything else.

"Thanks," Tess smile gratefully as she took the shirt once she was close to where Avery was. 

Avery biting her lip as she watched Tess turn to leave but before she could get out of the room she called out her sister's name. Watching as Tess turned back to her with a curious look.

Avery opening her mouth to ask her sister if she really liked Zac or if she was just going tonight to appease him. But her brain it seemed didn't want to cooperate as other words came out.

"You know, it's fine you didn't get Dad's artistic gene," Avery said instead watching as Tess only smiled. "Someone in the family had to be a math whiz and all," she shrugged not sure how her sister was even surviving as a Math major in college.

It was a major Avery wasn't sure she could do. Not when she had hated Math and needed Zac as a tutor in high school to even pass.

Yet Zac himself wasn't majoring in Math despite his love for it. He was it seemed destined to follow Avery into the arts as a career as he was majoring in art.

His passion being able to one day do comic book designs for a living.

Taylor it seemed was like Tess in that he was doing something practical. He was majoring in Architecture which was surprising since he seemed to love music so much.

Then again maybe he didn't want to get by on just dreams and wishes once college was done. Maybe he actually wanted to make something for himself by building things.

"Sure, dad's said the same but let's be honest Avery, he would have loved if both his darling daughters had been artistic geniuses like him," Tess laughed with a shake of her head. "But no, I had to be like mom and suck at it," she said with disdain almost.

As if being like their mom was a bad thing which it could be.

Their mom had left them in the care of their dad when they had been a year old. Saying that having children at eighteen had been a mistake and she wanted out.

So Jackson had let her have an out and Lorraine rarely saw her twin daughters after. Though she had shown up at their sixteenth birthday and graduation but that was that.

It was better off that way though because to Avery, her father was the best parent she could have had or needed. Lorraine not being around for them was her loss in the end.

Before she could reply to Tess though her sister turned around again, effectively ending the conversation as she left Avery's room.

Avery heading back to her easel. Wanting to get more of her painting done before Norah got off work and bugged her about going to the party that Taylor was throwing.

She just wasn't in the mood to let Norah down gently or try to let her down gently. But Avery wasn't up for partying. She'd much rather stay home tonight, drinking cheap wine out of paper cups and binge watch The Golden Girls.

*****

"You're sure you don't want to come to the party?" Norah questioned Avery as she came into the living room after changing clothes. "Taylor's going to wonder why you weren't there and I'm going to feel weird going without you. The invite was for you."

"The invite wasn't for me," Avery sighed as she took a drink from the paper cup in her hand. Already getting started on her drinking. "It was for you too and just tell Taylor I am sick. It will be partly the truth come tomorrow when I have a hangover," she rationalized.

Hating that she knew she'd drink that much but she just wanted to be dumb and forget that her sister was on a date with a boy Avery had been hopelessly in love with for years.

A boy who was oblivious and only had eyes for Avery's twin sister. A fact that proved the world was shit and hated her.

"And what if he doesn't believe me on you being sick?" Norah asked sounding fed up with Avery. 

"He'll live," Avery told her doubting Taylor would even care. Even if the other day had been weird between them but that was most likely a fluke. "He'll find some girl to get his dick wet with tonight and forget about his brother's supposedly sick best friend who missed his party," she shrugged before taking another drink of her wine.

"Hell, maybe you'll even find a girl to hook up with tonight Norah," Avery spoke teasingly wanting to just change the subject. "Everyone can get laid tonight while I sit at home miserable."

Norah rolled her eyes at Avery's dramatics, not that Avery blamed her. She'd roll her eyes at her own dramatics if she could.

"Let's hope he lives," Norah said as she walked towards the door. Grabbing her purse from where it was sitting by the door. "The last thing I need is Taylor up my ass tonight. People may question my lesbian status with him attached at my hip."

Snorting a laugh Avery only laughed harder as Norah turned to glare at her playfully before leaving the apartment. Leaving Avery all alone with her wine and the TV.

Avery's stomach choosing then to growl from hunger and she let out a frustrated sigh. Knowing she'd have to order something in because she was too lazy and too heartbroken to even try to fix anything.

But the thought of even getting up to get her phone to call anywhere also sounded exhausting. It truly was a depression issue and it was a bitch of one.

Though in the end she knew she'd cave and get the phone. While she was depressed, the last thing she wanted was to die of starvation and torture herself more.

*****

Avery who had opted out of watching The Golden Girls in favor of watching the first season of Dawson's Creek. Paused the third episode when there was a knock at the door. Her eyes looking down at her phone to see the time and she really hoped it was the pizza place with the pizza she had ordered thirty minutes ago.

They were already later than usual and she was telling herself she wasn't going to give them a tip. Not when she knew they were never this late delivering food.

Standing from the couch she grabbed her money and headed to the door. Opening it though when it was open she paused as she saw Taylor on the other side. Her face contorting some because she wasn't expecting him nor was she expecting him to be holding her pizza.

"You don't look sick," Taylor told her as he stepped inside even with her lack of an invite. "Norah said you were sick and you don't look it. Were you trying to play hokey to get out of my party so you could stay home and mope?" he asked like this was just a normal conversation and a normal thing.

Him walking into her shared apartment like they were friends. 

Rolling her eyes she shut the door as she followed him to the couch. The pizza box sitting on the coffee table as Taylor picked up her cup of wine.

His nose wrinkling as he smelled it.

"And you're drinking cheap ass wine," Taylor continued with a shake of his head as he looked up at her. "I can't believe you. You lying liar that lies."

"So what if I lied?" Avery asked almost defensively as she sat down beside him on the couch. "And why are you here? Bringing me my pizza?"

Taylor just smirked as he handed her cup over to her. "Because you were heart sick and it's always better to have company. Isn't the old saying misery loves company?"

Glaring Avery took a swallow of her wine. Knowing she was starting to feel a slight buzz. "It is but we're not friends and you're missing your own party. I don't think that's a good practice Tay," she told him as she sat back on the couch.

Taking a mental note that he had ignored her question about the pizza. Avery wondering just how he had manipulated the delivery guy into finding out it was hers and bringing it to her.

"The party was boring anyway," Taylor said like it was okay that he was missing out on it. 

"Which only means there was no one available for you to get your dick wet with," she quipped before she could even think about her words.

But they were true, Taylor was never known for fooling around or fucking the same girl twice so the party tonight must have had either a lot of lesbians which she doubted or a lot of the same girls Taylor had already messed around with in the past.

Laughing Taylor shook his head, "Oh no, there were girls there I could definitely have sex with if I wanted too but none of them appealed to me," he spoke as he shrugged his shoulders innocently. 

His eyes lingering on her longer than she liked.

"Now how about telling me what we're watching," he spoke as he opened the pizza box. Helping himself to her food like he had helped himself inside of her apartment.

"Dawson's Creek," Avery stated softly not even having it in her to argue with him anymore and get him to leave. "Do you want wine?" she asked deciding if she was going to let him stay she may as well be a good hostess and offer him a drink.

"Please," Taylor smiled as he finally looked away from her. "Even if I do hate cheap ass wine, I'll never turn it down because it is alcohol."

"And you're a lush so what's new?" Avery asked him as she stood from the couch to get him a cup as well as get a second bottle of wine. 

Listening as Taylor laughed at her quip. Though he didn't give her any kind of snarky answer back. Which was good enough for her.

At least maybe they could get through a few episodes of the show and he'd just leave. By then she'd probably be exhausted anyway.

*****

"This is boring," Taylor said dramatically after the fourth episode they had watched. "I mean I get why you are watching it. Zac is obviously you're Dawson and he is gone on a date with Jen who I guess Tess is, but it's still boring," he told her as he turned his head to look at her.

Avery telling from the look in his eyes he was as buzzed as she was already.

"We should do something fun,' he continued as he leaned in close to her. "They say sex helps broken hearts too."

Making a face Avery backed away from him, "I'm not having sex with you," she told him hating the way it seemed her vagina wasn't really protesting the idea much.

Not if the slight ache between her legs was anything to go by.

"Aww..are you a virgin who wants to do it all romantic with my brother?" Taylor asked her teasingly making her cheeks turn red.

His words also making her look away from him as well as she reached to turn the DVD off.

"I'm not waiting on Zac nor do I want it romantic," Avery defended as well as she guessed confirming that she was a virgin. "I know sex is just sex and I don't see the big elaborate emphasis everyone puts on it. I just haven't found a guy I feel comfortable being that vulnerable with," she continued as her blush grew.

Knowing that to allow a guy inside of her like that, she wanted to be okay being that damn vulnerable.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you this," Avery spoke as Taylor remained silent beside her. "You should go and obviously I need to get in bed," she said as she stood from the couch, shaking her head. "I'll put things away in the morning," she told him as she turned to walk down to her bedroom.

Not caring that right now she wasn't being the best hostess and showing her guest out of the room.

Then again it wasn't like he had been a planned visitor or anything. He was as unplanned as they came.

It was only when she made it to her room and had turned to shut the door, that she saw Taylor had followed her and again she made a face, ready to tell him off for not leaving like she had said for him to do. But before she could speak again Taylor decided to break his silence.

"What exactly have you done sexually Avery?" he asked her and Avery wasn't sure what she was most surprised about. The fact that he had used her full name instead of the damn nickname or the way his voice had sounded.

All low and sexy. Like how she pictured it was when he picked up any of the willing females who would put out for him. A thought that made her blush because clearly she wasn't willing. She hadn't even thrown herself at him.

Blushing she looked away from him and down at the door. Hearing the small click of her door as he shut it, though he was still in her room.

"I gave a guy a drunken blow job in tenth grade," she admitted with a blush on her cheeks. "Drunken for him I mean not for me. He didn't even remember it and still doesn't to this day," she told him fearing she had said too much.

Something that was confirmed when she looked at Taylor and even in his buzzed out fog, he looked like he had solved a big puzzle he was trying to figure out.

"You sucked my little brother off?" Taylor asked as he stepped closer to her. Avery feeling a shiver run down her spine at the look in Taylor's eyes. "And he doesn't even remember it?"

"No," Avery told him with a shake of her head giving a faint frown. "Hell he's never even seen me naked," she revealed before she could even stop herself.

"Can I see you naked Avery?" Taylor asked her and once again he stepped even closer to her. Close enough that he reached out, hooking a finger through her belt loop as he pulled her closer and of course she let him.

Wasn't sure if she could resist in the state she was in.

"You know there's other things I could do to get you off instead of having sex with you...or you could get yourself off while I watched and got off to it," he continued as he leaned in to kiss her but before their lips could connect Avery turned her head.

His lips landing on her cheek.

"Not on the lips," she told him softly. Hating the way her eyes fell shut as he kissed at her cheek again. His lips continuing to move further down.

Avery guessing her silence was all the consent he needed because with his lips attached to her neck, he lead them back to her bed. Avery letting him do that as well, so maybe that was also consent.

Which she hated because she should have been pushing him away. Telling him she didn't want him like that and she didn't want to be just another female he fooled around with, added to a list of many more.

But she didn't. Instead she fell back onto the bed. Her eyes opening once her back hit the surface and her hands automatically went for Taylor's shirt taking it off him. Hating the smirk on his lips at that.

She didn't call him on that though. Instead she let herself get lost in the moment, clothes continuing to come off and Taylor's lips on her neck every so often.

His hand making her shiver as it slowly went to towards the last article of clothing she had on now. Her panties which were soaked already. A fact that she was a bit embarrassed by because god she had never gotten wet because of Taylor fucking Hanson before.

Sober her was going to wake up with so many regrets in the morning. This being on the top of her list.

Once her panties were gone Taylor pulled away from Avery, her eyes watching as he went to take his own underwear off but she sat up then. Her hand going to stop him which only made him look at her curiously.

"C..can I do it?" she asked him hating the way her voice cracked. "I..it's only fair," she reasoned knowing it was. He had undressed her and now she wanted to take off the last piece of clothing he had on. Leaving him as naked and exposed as she was.

"S..sure," Taylor muttered out fumbling over his words which made Avery want to laugh because who knew the guy who had been with more women than he had fingers and toes would get nervous over a simple request.

Smirking slightly, Avery let her hands go to his boxers which she slowly peeled off him. Her eyes automatically going to his cock once he was naked. His cock already half hard and it was different than she expected.

He was bigger than she thought he would be, so maybe him being a bit cocky made sense. He had that big dick energy working for him and he did clearly have a big dick.

"So does my cock compare to Zac's?" Taylor asked breaking her thoughts and Avery only let out a groan as well as blush again because he had caught her staring.

"Shut up," Avery told him as she fell back against her bed, her legs falling open, her eyes not missing the way Taylor stared down at her exposed cunt. "Just shut up and enjoy the show," she sighed before letting her own hand go between her legs.

Her teeth sinking into her bottom lip as she began to rub at her own skin. Her brain wanting to get all heated and conjure up images of how this could be different. How it could be Taylor's hand but it wasn't. His hand was around his own cock which he was stroking now.

That thought again conjuring images from her brain of what it would be like to have it...him inside of her. Have his cock sheathed in her warm wetness.

The idea not being one her brain opposed apparently or maybe that was her vagina talking. All the blood having left her brain and gathered there somehow.

Making her ache more as she finally slipped two fingers inside of herself. Beginning to fuck herself with them.

"Fuck," Taylor grunted out as he watched her. "I never knew a good girl like you could fuck yourself like that," he spoke sounding almost astonished by the fact that she was laying mere inches from where he now sat.

Her fingers fucking her as he watched.

Rolling her eyes Avery continued what she was doing. "I may be inexperienced in a lot of things sexual minus you know blow jobs but I have done this a lot Tay," she retorted with not much venom in her voice. "Kind of an expert at getting myself off and making myself come," she continued knowing her words were getting to him if the way he pumped his cock harder was anything to go by.

"This is just the first time I've let anyone watch me get off," Avery smirked finally their eyes locking again and she swore she had never seen Taylor's lust directed solely at her before but now here in the moment she almost got why all the girls wanted him.

Why so many helplessly threw themselves at him. Yet, she'd still much rather throw herself at Zac if he'd have her but he wouldn't.

"Fuck," Avery hissed out as she bit down on her lip again. Her head falling back as her orgasm hit her unexpectedly.

Avery not sure if it was the thought of Zac in the moment with Taylor that did her in or just the way Taylor was looking at her. But one of those things had definitely done it.

Her whole body seeming to go soft as she lost herself to the feeling.

"God," Taylor groaned out and somehow in Avery's few seconds of lost coherence it seemed Taylor had gotten much closer to her. "I...god damn it I really want to come on you," he confessed and once again Avery was surprised by him. Surprised at how sheepish he sounded when he'd probably used that line so many time before.

"Want to paint you with my come and then lick it off you Avie," he continued and oh...there was a new nickname for him. One everyone used on her and yet the way he had said it. The way he had used it sounded much more dirtier than she had ever heard it before.

Smirking again she just looked at him not even having to think of her words before she said them.

"Then do it," she told him as she scooted down a bit closer to him. "Paint me with your come," she spoke as her smirk grew.

Her words being all he needed it seemed because soon enough he was coming undone from where he hovered above her. Her stomach being coated in his come and she couldn't even complain because she said he could do it.

Told him to do it.

All she could do now was let her eyes flutter shut as he eventually leaned down and licked her stomach clean. Goosebumps forming on her skin at the contact and the way he was doing it all slow. Like somehow he wanted to savor this moment.

Avery hating that maybe Taylor had been right, maybe all she needed was an orgasm to feel better, because for now. For these few minutes of bliss that Taylor had somehow helped her achieve she felt okay.

Expecting that when she woke tomorrow she wouldn't. But she'd deal with tomorrow when it happened.

*****

"You got a text while you were in the shower," Taylor spoke as he looked up at Avery as she came back into her bedroom, freshly showered and dressed in her pajamas.

Avery thankful that he too was now dressed.

"I didn't read it but I heard it vibrate," he continued as if she had thought he had invaded her privacy and read her text messages.

"I'll check it later," she shrugged as she went to sit down beside him on the bed. Hating the nerves she had around him now.

Liked it much better when all she had was disdain for him. But that was before he had kissed her neck and before he had literally came on her, licking his come off her skin. Her body still feeling like it was on fire. Set alight by flames because of him of all the damned people it could have been.

Taylor only nodded his head, standing up almost wordlessly as he made to exit her room and Avery doubted he was as nervous as he seemed. He'd done this before countless times to women. She wasn't the first and she wasn't going to be the last either.

"Hey, Tay," she called out watching as he turned to face her with a curious look on his face. "Thanks for checking up on my sick ass," she told him liking the sight of the smirk on his face and the sound of his laughter.

Because now things felt okay between them. No silly nerves. 

He was still the boy she hated and she was the girl he loved to badger because he probably knew she hated him.

"Yeah, well the doctor ordered me to come so whatever," Taylor shrugged in the way that only he could. "I think he'll be happy to hear how well I took care of you. I have A plus bedside manners."

Shaking her head Avery fell silent, Taylor continuing to smirk before offering her a wink as he turned back around to leave. Avery waiting until he was out of eyesight to reach for her phone. Making a face when she saw the message was from her sister Tess and what it said, because it hurt like a knife in her chest.

 **Tess 11:49**  
On the way home now but god the date was perfect. Zac was perfect.


	3. Worn Me Down Like A Road

Chewing on her lip as she walked into Chick-fil-a on campus Avery looked around for Norah and Gage. She was meeting both of them for lunch today. Mainly because the person she usually ate lunch with when he wasn't fawning over Tess she was avoiding.

Not wanting to see him after he had taken her sister out a mere four days ago because she didn't want to hear him gushing about her. It had been hard enough before Tess had cracked and now that she had it was going to be even worse once she did finally see Zac.

Of that she was sure because during the past four days she had been stuck listening to Tess talk about it. It was all Tess seemed to talk about anymore, like going on the date with Zac had made her finally realize Zac existed outside of the boy who had started pestering her out of the blue in the tenth grade.

Avery wishing she could pinpoint what had caused Zac's crush on her sister. If she could she'd easily buy a time machine and go into the past to change whatever it was.

Finally spotting Norah and Gage sitting at a table near the back, Avery felt something inside of her deflate some when she saw a familiar dirty blonde sitting opposite them.

Because of course it would be her luck that Taylor had joined them. Probably having seen them on their way and inserting himself into the picture like he always did things.

He was on her list of people she hadn't wanted to see in the last few days either. Avery having been right in her guess that when she awoke Saturday morning she'd have regrets about what happened with Taylor and boy did she.

She had enough regrets that she'd taken two showers before five pm. Wanting to wash off any traces of Taylor on her, as well as not believing that drunk her could allow herself to be one of the many girls who Taylor had fooled around with. Though Avery guessed the positive was he'd never touch her again.

He'd taken her in some ways and killed his curiosity and he'd move on to the next girl.

But even with that knowledge she hadn't wanted to face him. Wasn't sure how to even look at him knowing they'd seen each other naked. Knowing that she had let him come on her.

Taking a deep breath Avery worked up her nerve, letting her legs take her to the table where her friends were seated. 

"You're finally here," Norah said almost exasperated when Avery reached them. "I was afraid your food would get cold," she told her as she pushed what she had ordered for Avery in front of the only seat left available.

The seat right next to Taylor. Which she sat down in doing her best not to look at Taylor, aware that he was staring at her.

His stare making her feel as dirty as she had felt Saturday morning.

"I know, but class ran over some and I tried to get here as fast as I could," Avery shrugged as she gave Norah a guilty smile. 

"Or you're just perpetually always late," Taylor chimed in, making Avery turn her head to look at him. Hating the smirk on his face. "Zac always complains about that, you know. That you're never on time for anything," he revealed as if it was some secret.

It wasn't though, Avery knew that Zac hated that she was never on time for anything. It was a running joke it was because she was the youngest twin by forty minutes.

She couldn't even arrive on time for her own labor apparently and she had to make Lorraine wait.

"Zac's an asshole though so what is new?" Avery asked with a bit of bark to her reply. Taylor's smirk never wavering.

Instead he seemed to grow bolder because his hand went to rest against her thigh, Avery swallowing hard at the action as well as thankful that Norah and Gage couldn't see over the table. See how far up her thigh his hand was.

Avery cursing the fact that she was wearing a skirt. Something she rarely did but she had forgotten to do her laundry until this morning so she had no clean pants to wear.

"Speaking of Zac," Gage spoke before Taylor had time to snark back at Avery. "Are you mad at him?" he questioned his words throwing Avery off.

Her face must have shown it because Gage sighed before explaining himself.

"Zac thinks you're mad at him because he hasn't seen you since last Wednesday at the coffeehouse. He says you even ignored his text about coming over to watch a movie with us yesterday night."

Blushing Avery looked down and away from Gage's gaze. Taylor's hold on her thigh tightening, reminding Avery that he was there. A goddamn thorn in her side who seemed to know her every secret now.

Even if he really didn't.

"I'm not mad at him," Avery said as she looked back up at him, moving her hand down to take Taylor's hand off her thigh. Watching him from the corner of her eyes after it was gone. Hating how casually he could go back to eating his food like nothing had just happened. "I'm just not up for hearing all about Tess from him. Not when Tess won't shut the fuck up about him."

After she had said that Avery reached for the sandwich Norah had ordered for her. Taking a bite so she'd have a distraction in case anyone else asked something of her that she wasn't comfortable answering right away.

At least having food in her mouth was a reasonable excuse not to talk right away. Kept her from looking like an idiot.

Now it was Gage who looked at her curiously. "You almost sound jealous there Avery," he said honestly and well, maybe everyone didn't know about her crush on Zac.

Maybe it was just Norah and Taylor and she was fine. It made sense then that Zac was oblivious because others were too.

"Pippi is jealous," Taylor snorted from beside her and again she turned to face him with a glare. "She has a massive crush on Zac, Gage," he revealed as if it was his secret to share. "Have you not noticed?"

"Shut up," Avery hissed at him in between bites of her food. "I don't have a crush on Zac," she denied but even her words sounded fake to her own ears.

Gage laughing from across the table.

"I don't know why you are denying it Avery," he finally said once he had stopped laughing. "Taylor is right and I've noticed," he admitted and she was sure the color on her face drained some. "I think the only ones who haven't noticed are Zac and Tess obviously if she's okay with dating the boy her sister is head over heels for."

"I'm not head over heels," Avery snapped as she stood from the table. Not even caring that her food was half eaten. She was just annoyed at that the moment.

Hated that it seemed everyone found her situation funny when she didn't. She hated it.

"And I hate all of you," she growled out before turning on her heel and leaving them all there. Making a new list of people she wanted to avoid for the foreseeable future.

A longer list of people.

"Avery," a voice spoke from behind her. A voice that only made her want to walk faster but against her better judgement, she stopped in her tracks, coming face to face with Taylor who had apparently followed her out of the restaurant. "I'm sorry," he apologized.

Avery wanting to believe him but she didn't. 

When was he ever sorry for anything?

"No, you aren't," she told him with a shake of her head. "You're not sorry and neither are they. None of you guys who take the piss out of the situation are sorry. You all find it funny and laughable but I don't," she said not able to stop now that she had started. "It's not funny having to watch Zac like someone who isn't me even more so knowing Tess is going to fall for his charms right back because who wouldn't right?" she asked hating the way her voice cracked at that.

"Who wouldn't fall for someone like Zac?" she asked again and again her voice cracked. Avery becoming aware of the tears going down her cheek after the fact.

Before she could say more though, Taylor was pulling her into him and she didn't even fight him on it. Instead she just became a sobbing mess in his arms.

Not caring that people were probably watching her. Making judgments on the weird crazy girl losing it in Taylor Hanson's arms.

"Zac's an idiot though," Taylor eventually told her as her sobs seemed to slow down. "He doesn't really deserve anyone loving him."

Letting out a sad laugh Avery pulled away from Taylor then as she wiped at her eyes. Hating that Taylor had made her laugh, even if it was a sad laugh.

"Yeah well I love him even if he doesn't deserve it and Tess will love him too one day," she frowned not sure if she was ready for the day when Tess told her she loved Zac back.

She was sure it was going to kill her.

Taylor seemed to go silent at that, both of them standing there in an awkward but somewhat comfortable silence. Silence that was broken by Taylor in the end.

"You know coming to the coffeehouse tonight might cheer you up. I'm going to sing again at open mic night," he told her as if that was incentive enough to get her to come.

It wasn't.

"I don't know if feel up to going out," Avery admitted hating that all she wanted to do was stay cooped up in her room. "But maybe I'll consider it," she added on watching as Taylor flashed her a tiny smile. "It's a big maybe," she added on but his smile never wavered.

"A maybe works in my book Pippi," Taylor shrugged and again he was leaning into her, leaving a kiss on her cheek and this time she swore his lips lingered longer than they had last time. "Maybe's can always turn into a yes," he said as he pulled away.

Turning to walk away from her before she could say anything else to him. Avery just watching as he went.

*****

Avery who was on her bed reading a book for her English class, looked up when she heard a tiny knock on her door. Feeling a bit surprised to see Zac standing there.

Especially since according to Gage he thought Avery was mad at him.

But it seemed even while thinking that he was the first one to crack and break the spell they had been on of not seeing each other.

"Figured you'd be painting," Zac said as he walked cautiously into her room and it seemed he was still under the assumption that Avery was mad at him. So with that assumption he was toeing the line.

Clearly still afraid that Avery would be mad and likely chew his head off. 

It wasn't like it was a new thing. Avery had a temper and she had taken it out on Zac before when he had done something wrong, except this time he really hadn't done anything wrong.

It wasn't wrong for him to date Tess or like her. He had never been hers and one blow job that she had given him while he was drunk while in high school meant nothing, especially since he didn't even remember it.

"Kind of blocked," Avery admitted honestly, shutting the book as Zac sat on her bed. "Decided to get some reading done in Wuthering Heights," she said as she made a face because she disliked the book. 

Zac nodded as he stayed silent for a bit. A hand running through his shaggy hair and Avery hated the fact that she wanted to run her hand through his hair. Wanted to play with it but she wasn't sure what kind of boundaries they should set now since it seemed he had Tess.

"Blocked because you are mad at me?" Zac finally asked her breaking the silence between them. Avery tearing her gaze off him.

"No," she said as she shook her head. "And I'm not mad at you."

"But you've been avoiding me," Zac argued and he had the audacity to whine some. "I don't know why you're avoiding me if you aren't mad."

Biting her lip, it was Avery now who ran a hand through her own hair. "Because I don't want to hear about Tess and your date with her," she explained deciding to be partly honest. "I already hear about it from her which is enough in my opinion."

"I wouldn't have talked about her," Zac told her but when Avery turned her gaze back to him, he gave her a sheepish look that let her know he would have. "Okay, maybe I would have but I won't if you spend time with me tonight," he said as he let his hand go to the hem of her skirt.

Avery hating the fact that she liked it when he played with the hem of her skirt so nonchalant.

"And what do you want to do tonight Zac?"

"Go to the coffeehouse and watch Taylor sing," Zac smiled so big as he answered her. Avery hating his answer because that was the last thing she wanted.

Even if she told Taylor she'd think about it.

There was no way she wanted to go see the guy she'd been naked with this weekend, while the guy she crushed on was just going to be sitting beside her oblivious to it all.

"Oh come on Avie baby," Zac pouted as if he could sense her hesitancy. "Please come for me. I promise not to talk about Tess and you'll have my undivided attention."

Rolling her eyes Avery moved from her bed, "Fine," she relented with a shake of her head. "Just leave the room so I can change clothes," she said knowing she'd feel comfortable in her jeans, which she finally did have some clean ones now.

Having done her laundry once she got home from classes.

"No," Zac state as he too stood from her bed. "You look cute in what you have on Avie," he said as if he always complimented her clothing and okay sometimes he did.

Like the shirt she had let Tess borrow and now the outfit she was wearing today.

"Though maybe put your hair up in a bun," he suggested as he walked towards the door of her bedroom. "It adds on to the cuteness factor."

Blushing now that Zac was out of eye sight Avery truly hated herself for how fast she moved to get a hair tie and put her hair up like he had suggested.

Hated that she wanted a reason for him to find her even more cute.


	4. Our Secret Moments In A Crowded Room

Going into the coffeehouse with Zac, Avery slowed some once they were inside. Her eyes landing on the couch they had been seated on last time. Not surprised to find Taylor there nor was she surprised to see a brunette seated beside Taylor.

"Who is the girl with Taylor?" Avery asked as she looked up at Zac who was standing beside her. His hand landing on her back softly as he lead her toward the couches as well. Avery guessing they'd get the one opposite Taylor and his brunette friend.

"Potential fuck probably," Zac smirked as he leaned in close enough so that only Avery could hear him. "I bet it's the girl he has been raving about for months now. The one he wants to get in his bed long term."

Making a face at Zac's words Avery wasn't sure why she was shocked. Hadn't Taylor implied to her last week there was someone he may have wanted.

Then again that was before he had wound up in her bed, where he had literally begged to come on her. Avery guessing then she hadn't been the only one using someone that night. He had indeed used her as a fill in for whoever it seemed he wanted to fuck long term.

"He's really ready for another relationship?" Avery asked softly, knowing it had been two years since his last real relationship ended.

Natalie had broken Taylor's heart and set him on the spiral he had been on. The one where he only hooked up with girls once and then moved on. So she was surprised to know it seemed that he felt he was ready for one. Even if apparently he was okay with fucking around until he landed whoever the girl was he wanted.

Zac shrugged, "I think Taylor thinks he is ready, I think his dick on the other hand may have other ideas," he spoke and his words made Avery blush.

Avery hating the way her mind conjured up an image of Taylor's dick then. How it had looked mere days ago as they literally watched each other get off. How she had wanted it to be inside of her but she hadn't spoke up and said anything.

Knew deep down it was the alcohol. After all she was still pathetically gone for the boy beside her. The boy with the damn crooked smile and brown eyes that could always draw her in.

Avery wasn't into gorgeous smiles and blue eyes. She wasn't into cockiness and narcissism. She liked a sense of humor and a bit of a head on the shoulders type thing.

Sadly it seemed Tess would be the one getting what Avery liked.

"You came Pippi," Taylor exclaimed the moment Avery and Zac reached where he was. Both of them sitting on the empty couch across from him. Avery biting her tongue to keep from telling him off. "I knew you'd come in the end," he smirked and Avery felt a shiver run down her spine at the way he said his last statement.

Had a feeling he meant it in a less than innocent way.

"Well, you're dear younger brother can be convincing," Avery smirked right back at him as her gaze turned to Zac who just looked confused. Like he didn't understand the conversation going on around him really. "Thank him for getting me to come," she said keeping her tone more neutral than Taylor's had been.

But she swore she saw a hint of something flash in his eyes at that.

"And why not introduce us to your friend?" Avery asked and this time Taylor blushed at her words. His gaze finally going back to the brunette beside him, Avery almost swearing again that she could read him.

See that somehow he had almost forgot about the girl next to him and if that was the case she highly doubted the brunette was the one he wanted long term.

So she guessed that girl was still going to be a mystery for the time being.

Things between all four of them seeming to back to normal after that. Taylor introducing them to the girl beside him, who was apparently named McKinley and she was in one of Taylor's classes. Avery not having really caught which one because she had been too busy staring at Zac some.

Something she couldn't help when he ran a hand through his hair. It was just something that did things to Avery that she couldn't really explain right.

But it made her ache between her legs as much as what she had done with the blue eyed boy across from them had.

Hearing her phone go off in her purse, Avery wrinkled her nose some as she tore his gaze away from Zac then to get her phone out. Not exactly sure who'd be messaging her right now.

Norah was at work and so was Tess. The only other person who would text her was sitting right beside her and she had been staring at him so she knew it hadn't been Zac.

Once she had her phone out Avery felt that blush again when she saw Taylor's name in her notifications. Her gaze wondering up to see him looking down at his phone, acting none the wiser as he had obviously checked out of McKinley and Zac's conversation on some history book they were both reading.

History being something Zac loved. Though not as much as Math and Art.

Taking her gaze off of Taylor, Avery finally opened the text from him. Her blush not at all going away.

 **T-bird 7:45**  
You keep staring at Zac like that and he may be clued in on your crush for him.

 **Avery 7:55**  
Shut up.

 **T-bird 7:58**  
Is that anyway to talk to someone who has seen you naked?

 **Avery 8:02**  
Temporary lapse of judgement. Is this all you text me for? To bother me.

 **T-bird 8:07**  
No, I also wanted you to sneak away and meet me in the bathroom Pippi. You in that skirt and your hair up in that bun. It's doing things to my cock that I'm pretty sure you can help with.

 **Avery 8:09**  
Funny. We've hooked up once, you don't want me again. Take McKinley to the bathroom.

 **T-bird 8:13**  
McKinley doesn't bat for my team. Anyway it's not her cunt I want to taste.

Squirming as she read Taylor's last text message over, Avery looked up from her phone. Not surprised when she found Taylor staring back at her.

Their gaze only being broken when Taylor mentioned something about getting a drink and doing some last minute planning for his performance tonight. Avery only blushing more because she knew where he was going. He was heading to the bathroom they had here.

A single bathroom that was for everyone and so if she took him up on what he wanted they'd have to be quick. Then again Avery wasn't sure how long it'd take her to come with someone's face between her legs. Getting oral wasn't something she had ever done.

Though she had wanted to try it. Most of her fantasies of it involving Zac and that tongue of his but well obviously that was never going to happen. That thought it seemed being what made up her mind. Avery leaning into Zac as she was at least partly honest.

Telling him she saw a friend at one of the many tables and she wanted to go and talk to them.

She did have a friend or sort of friend she was meeting up with. Not that she'd tell Taylor she had just thought of him as that. It would make his ego grow and she didn't want that happening.

"Hurry back though Avie," Zac told her as he turned away from his conversation with McKinley. "You're supposed to be spending time with me tonight? Remember?" he asked her as if she could forget.

"I will," Avery told him before leaning in and leaving a small kiss on his cheek as she stood up from the couch. Making sure Zac wasn't watching her as she made a beeline for the bathroom.

Making it to the bathroom, Avery swore she was now probably as red as a tomato from her blushing but she really couldn't help but blush given the way Taylor, who was leaning against the wall outside the bathroom door, was looking at her.

Avery hating the triumphant smirk on his face. Taylor obviously having suspected she'd come.

She was only glad when he wordlessly opened the door to the bathroom. The both of them stepping inside rather discreetly. Avery's hand reaching to turn the light on as Taylor locked the door behind them. His way of being cautious that no one would walk in.

Find them in this public restroom doing things they shouldn't have been doing.

"You're so hot," Taylor muttered as he let his arms slip around her waist. Avery's eyes falling shut as his lips found their way to her neck.

A place that they had been on before. Just a few short days ago and a place that it seemed she didn't mind him kissing as much if the wetness between her legs was anything to go by.

Then again she had been wet before she even came to the bathroom to meet him. So it wasn't all him. He just wasn't helping the situation any.

"I'm just dressed up a little," Avery told him as she let out a small moan as he nipped at her neck. Her eyes opening some as Taylor lead her to the sink. "You saw me earlier today and didn't seem too affected," she said as her mind went back to the lunch she had ran out on.

The lunch in which his hand had wound up on her thigh and oh.....maybe he had been affected by her. Just a tiny bit.

"Oh trust me Avie," Taylor spoke against her skin as he let her body rest against the sink. "You affected me then too," he smirked as he pulled away from her neck. Locking eyes with her in the mirror. "But you with your hair up in this bun. It does even more wonderful things for my cock," he told her as his hips moved into hers.

Avery feeling his erection right up against her ass. A small part of her wanting to tell him the hair in a bun idea had been Zac's but she didn't. Instead she just bit her tongue and turned around to face him.

"If you're that hard then why do you want to just go down on me?" Avery asked him as she quirked an eyebrow up. Instinctively going to sit on the sink as Taylor found his way between her legs. "Wouldn't you want my mouth around your cock?" 

Taylor smirked again as he pushed Avery's skirt up, though he made no move to drop to his knees or even take her panties off just yet.

"You can suck my cock this weekend," Taylor spoke softly, his hand finally going to push her underwear down. "When you come over to my apartment to finish watching Dawson's Creek with me."

Avery opened her mouth to argue that she would do no such thing but Taylor dropped to his knees then. Her legs seeming to spread wider for him without her even meaning to let them.

"We both know you will. Otherwise you'll just end up staying in your apartment Friday night moping alone because Zac and Tess are going out again," he said reminding her of her twin sister's next date with the boy Avery desperately wanted as her own.

Closing her mouth Avery watched as Taylor's smirk grew at that and before she could call him on it. A moan slipped past her lips when Taylor's lips attached to her already too wet pussy. Her eyes falling shut at the sensation of his mouth and his tongue working on her sensitive flesh.

A feeling she'd never felt before and one she almost regretted going so long without now that she had her first taste of it. Knew how good it felt to have a mouth on her cunt.

Letting her head fall back as Taylor continued to lick and suck at her with his mouth. Avery let her teeth dig into her bottom lip. Her hips bucking up some into him, which caused him to let his hands come to rest on either side of her waist.

Keeping her in place and she didn't want to protest that but at the same time she did. She wanted to protest it because god she fucking needed to get off and Taylor it seemed wanted to prolong it. As if they had all the time in the world when they didn't.

Not when they were in a public restroom and he was due on stage soon. 

Then there was Zac who may have noticed she lied and wasn't anywhere nearby. Avery not sure what she'd tell him if he did realize she lied because there was no way she could tell him the truth. That she had been in the bathroom with his brother between her legs.

Wasn't sure he'd like the truth either even if he was dating or maybe dating her sister now. A fact Avery didn't like and would never like.

Biting down on her lip harder when she finally felt her orgasm getting close. Avery felt her legs tighten some around Taylor's head. A tiny moan coming out of her mouth against her will as he slipped two fingers inside of her, Avery not even realizing he had moved one of his hands.

"Fuck...Taylor," she hissed out as she just rode out her orgasm on his face now that she could move some. His fingers somehow moving with her and everything was just making her buzzed.

Making her feel things she hadn't before because there was no way her own hand had ever made her feel as good as his mouth and fingers had.

Avery almost feeling bad that she had to wait a few days to get her mouth around his cock. She wanted to properly thank him for how he'd made her feel and making him wait a few days didn't feel like a proper thanking. Not in her opinion anyway.

Maybe she could make him brownies tomorrow. But even that felt too long really and still not proper enough.

As he moved out from between her legs, Avery just laughed softly at how he looked. He looked almost as wrecked as she felt and he hadn't even been the one who had an orgasm.

Reaching out Avery let her fingers link into his belt loops as she pulled Taylor closer to her. Their eyes locking as she saw a question dancing around in his blue eyes.

A question she hoped she answered when she let her lips go to kiss at the skin of his neck then. Much like he'd kissed at her neck numerous times. Avery still not wanting to kiss him on the lips.

Despite the fact that now not only had he came on her but he just had his head between her legs.

Kissing his neck a bit harder when he started to moan at what she was doing, Avery realized then that maybe she liked the sound of his moans. Liked knowing she was the one making him moan, though she wasn't sure why he had hooked up with her again or even why he wanted to do so again this weekend.

Then again she remembered Zac telling her about the girl he wanted and Avery wondered then if he was just using her for practice. Using someone who he had no emotional connection with as practice for if he could get back into the groove of hooking up with someone more than once.

Avery knowing she could be okay with that because in the end she was using him too in ways. To fill the Zac shaped hole in her heart.

Pulling away from kissing his neck Avery stood up as she watched Taylor taking her panties out of the pocket of his jeans. Her hand going to grab them the minute he handed them back to her and as she slipped them on she watched as he went to undo his jeans.

Avery having to look away when it became apparent he was going to jack off to get rid of his erection.

"You know, I could...I mean...you don't have to use your hand," Avery explained dumbly. "I have a mouth and I'd be willing to suck your cock for you," she told him as she finally looked at him again. Seeing that he had worked his cock through the zipper in his jeans.

His hand moving on himself much like it had done a few nights prior. Avery's head now full of images of him above her again. His come as it landed on her stomach and him licking it off her.

Taylor shook his head as he just looked at her for a minute. His hand moving a bit faster on himself. "I'm good," he told her. "Anyway I don't know what lie you told my brother but you better get back to him soon before he knows you lied. You know how moody he gets when lied too," he muttered out and Avery nodded her head.

Adjusting her skirt as she left the bathroom.

*****

When she made it back to where Zac was on the couch, Avery raised an eyebrow seeing Gage and Norah both seated on the couch McKinley and Taylor had once been on.

"You two actually came?" Avery asked as she sat down beside Zac again.

Norah nodded her head at Avery's words, "Guess Taylor is wearing us all down," she laughed and her words made Avery force a smile because when it came to her they could apply in more than one way.

"I only came cause Tay offered me free coffee after," Gage shrugged which made them all laugh. "Was going to sit next to Zac too but he said he was saving that seat for you," he told her as he looked at her knowingly and her forced smile soon turned into a more genuine one as she turned to face Zac.

"We're spending the night together Avie," Zac told her as he leaned his forehead against hers. Avery feeling her heartbeat do weird things at his affection. As well as knowing they were close enough they could almost kiss but they didn't.

They couldn't because he didn't see her like that and it was her twin sister he wanted.

"That means I save seats for you," Zac smiled before moving his forehead off hers. His lips going to kiss her forehead in an entirely too platonic manner for Avery's liking.

The four of them of them soon getting into some idle conversation as they awaited Taylor's singing. 

Avery not being able to help it when Taylor did finally take the stage, her eyes drawn on him as he had a guitar again and just like the last time it felt he was looking at her as he began to sing.

_He's got so much love for her_   
_But he doesn't know what to do_   
_Sitting in the car_   
_Waiting outside of school_

_He's in for a heartbreak if it's all been blind faith_   
_From my point of view_

'I'm sorry," Norah spoke midway through Taylor's singing, Avery turning her head to see that somehow her roommate had wedged herself between Avery and Zac. "I mean for what happened at the restaurant earlier.

Avery shook her head, "It's fine," she smiled and this time it wasn't forced. "I'm over it now," she said honestly because she was over it. Being around Zac had helped..and oddly so had having an orgasm.

"Maybe so but still," Norah sighed as she looked over at Gage who seemed more invested in talking to McKinley who had came back over to them. Avery not having the heart to tell him that McKinley was a lesbian. "Taylor told us to apologize," she revealed and her words made Avery pause then.

Her attention being drawn back to Taylor.

_Baby, he's got to be crazy_   
_Living like he's John Wayne_   
_Always facing the world and chasing the girl_   
_Baby, he's got to be crazy_

_He's got so much in his heart_   
_But he doesn't know what to do_   
_All he wants is her_   
_Lying inside his room_

_He's always feeling cheated, telling all his secrets_   
_That I couldn't keep_

She didn't know why she was surprised that he had asked them to apologize but she was.

"He did?" Avery asked wanting to get confirmation from Norah but by the time she turned around Norah was gone. Leaving Zac looking at her weirdly.

"Who did what Avie baby?" Zac asked as he let an arm drape around her shoulder. 

Shaking her head Avery shook her head, "Nothing," she lied seeing that Zac wasn't entirely satisfied with her answer. "Just Norah being dumb and saying something dumb about someone," she lied some more not sure if Zac still believed her but she turned away from him before she could see his reaction.

Her forehead creasing some at the look Taylor was now giving her as he finished off the song. Like somehow he didn't like something she had done but she couldn't figure out what it was.

She was just sitting here with Zac's arm around her shoulder. How could she have done something wrong?

_Baby, he's got to be crazy_   
_Living like he's John Wayne_   
_Always facing the world and chasing the girl_   
_Baby, he's got to be crazy_

_Baby, he's got to be crazy_   
_Living like he's John Wayne_   
_Always facing the world and chasing the girl_   
_Baby, he's got to be crazy_

*****

After Taylor's set was done he soon joined the group back at the spot where they were. Three cups of coffee in his hand as he made to sit down on the empty spot on Avery's other side she watched as he handed one of the cups to Gage.

The second cup soon being handed to her and she raised an eyebrow as she just eyed him as he sat down beside her.

"It's your usual coffee order right?" Taylor asked as he leaned in so only she could hear him. "Two creams and one sugar?"

"Y..yeah," Avery confirmed with a nod of her head not even knowing he'd been around her enough to know how she took her coffee. She didn't even know how he took his.

Then again she never really cared how he took his because up until lately he was just Zac's annoying brother. He still was that except now he gave her orgasms.

Taylor for the second time that night seemed to smile triumphantly. Avery choosing then to look away from him as she took a drink from the coffee he had gotten for her. One she hadn't even asked him for nor had it been a condition of her coming like it had been for Gage.

"Let me take you home," Taylor asked as he leaned into her again this time surprising her as she had to turn her head to look at him. "I think I want to take you up on that offer you made before," he told her and she knew what he meant.

He wanted that blow job, not wanting to wait until this weekend apparently.

"I can't let you do that," Avery told him as she shook her head. "I came here with Zac," she said becoming aware of the boy on her other side as he choose then to let his arm move away from her shoulder. 

Avery turning her head to see that he had his phone in his hand. Typing some text to her sister from what she could see and there was that raging pit of jealousy in her stomach.

The green eyed monster reminding her how awful she was because she should be happy for her sister and her best friend in the end.

Turning back to Taylor she watched as he only shrugged, "Your loss then, you just seemed so eager before," he told her and while she had she couldn't help but feel his words were a lie. A cover up for something Avery hadn't figured out because again Taylor was giving her all these puzzle pieces to a puzzle she felt like she didn't have the full picture of.

Not like she did when it came to Zac who she knew was gone for her sister. Gone enough that he'd sort of went back on his word and was now texting Tess when he was supposed to be spending time with Avery.

"Fine," Avery relented watching as Taylor smirked once again. "I'll let you drive me home," she agreed already hating herself for the fact that she'd have to think of another lie to tell Zac.

Something convincing on why she wanted to go home without him taking her back.


	5. Always Facing The World And Chasing The Girl

"Are you sure you don't want to leave yet?" Zac asked Avery as he looked down at her with a raised eyebrow. His gaze making Avery blush as well as feel bad for the lie she had told him.

How she wanted to stay at the coffeehouse a bit longer and she'd just let Taylor take her home because of course he was staying longer too. Apparently doing some last minute studying for a test he had tomorrow in one of his classes.

Avery not entirely sure how he made it some days because he seemed like he barely did study and when he did it was last minute studying. For her she studied for days before tests, sometimes staying up all night just to make sure she got everything right.

It was during one of those all night study sessions last year that she and Norah found that shitty diner were Tess now worked.

"Yeah," Avery nodded her head as she forced a smile. Hoping that Zac couldn't see through it. "I'm just not ready to head back yet."

Zac gave her a look as he creased his forehead, his brown eyes looking troubled. "Fine," he told her with a sigh. Obviously not taking her words at face value but also not calling her on them either. "Just text me when you make it home okay?" he asked and Avery heard the sincerity in his tone.

Knew he really did want her to text him and she hated the way she felt slightly guilty for her lie. That she was lying to her best friend just so that she could give his brother a blow job as he took her home or before he took her home. 

Avery not really sure when he'd want that blow job. If he'd want it while they were still here or if he'd want it in his car pulled off on the side of the road somewhere between the coffeehouse and the apartment where Avery lived.

"I will," Avery told Zac as she kept her forced smile despite the guilt she had. "I promise," she added on for good measure. Her words being enough then for Zac to walk away and leave her here in the coffeehouse.

Silence settling around her as she just eyed Taylor who was sitting on the couch across from her still on his laptop. 

"You going to keep your promise and text him?" Taylor asked as he looked up from his laptop. Avery hating the way it felt like Taylor was looking right through her. "Or was that a lie to appease his troubled mind Pippi?"

"Do you always listen to other people's conversations?" Avery retorted not even answering his question.

Though her words didn't seem to affect him. Not if his smirk were any indication to go by.

"Feisty I see," Taylor said as he went back to looking at his laptop. "Just hope you don't bite my cock off later when it's in your mouth," he said and Avery hated the way he could casually just say that.

A blush once again working its way onto her cheeks. 

"I wouldn't do that," Avery told him honestly. "Though the idea is kind of tempting."

Taylor only smirked at that though another silence settled over them. Avery taking her phone out then, deciding she'd just browse the web on it until Taylor was ready to go. There after all was nothing better for her to do here.

*****

Chewing her lip as she sat in the passenger side of Taylor's car, Avery hated the nerves building in her stomach as Taylor pulled into the parking space at her apartment. 

"Are you going inside with me?" Avery questioned as he cut his car off. "Because if you want me to give you a blow job in my room it's going to be hard to explain to Norah and Tess why you are there," she told him knowing Norah was indeed home and surely Tess was home by now too.

Her night shift at the diner usually ending by now so she was home. More than likely catching up on TV shows that she had missed and had to DVR. That or talking to Zac but the last thought was one Avery didn't want to think about it because it would just make her jealous.

That was the last thing she needed right now. Not when she'd already been jealous when she saw Zac texting Tess while they had been at the coffeehouse. Texting her when he was supposed to have been spending time with Avery. Just Avery.

Clearly Avery wasn't enough for him though and she'd never been enough for him. Not since his stupid fascination with Tess had started.

"No," Taylor told her as he shook his head and she watched as he moved his hand down to undo the zip on his jeans. "I was hoping we could be risky again and that you'd blow me out here in front of your apartment building," he said and Avery hated the way her heartbeat got faster.

Her palms getting a bit sweaty at that too because what he wanted made her nervous. They could most definitely get caught doing that and that would probably be worse then having to lie to Norah or Tess on why she was bringing Taylor into their apartment and leading him down to her bedroom.

It also made that scenario seem better.

"You're serious?" Avery asked him once she could finally find her voice and when she looked down and saw him stroking his half hard cock she knew he was indeed serious.

He wanted her to suck his cock in the parking lot of her apartment complex. He really wanted to be that risky like some messy hoe.

Then again Taylor was very much a messy hoe and Avery had always known that about him. Which was why she wasn't sure why she kept letting him do this to her. Make her weak in sexual ways and she also wasn't sure why he kept wanting her too when he had someone he liked.

That and he had his damn rule of no hook ups with the same person more than once. A rule he kept breaking for her it seemed.

"Of course I'm serious Ave," Taylor spoke his voice all soft as he moved his hand off his cock now. His hand soon taking hers and guiding it to his cock. Letting her hand replace his and without being told what to do Avery began to move her hand on him like he had his hand doing not too long ago.

The feel of him in her hand arousing her more than she expected it too. After all it was just a simple act. She was just giving him a hand job.

She'd done the same to his brother all the years ago when she'd blown him as well.

Avery wasn't sure if it was thought of Zac or what it was but before she could second guess herself she moved in close to Taylor, leaning down once she was close enough and letting her mouth wrap around his cock. Her hand falling away from it as her mouth began to move on him like her hand had been doing.

Her eyes falling shut when she felt his hand tangle into the bun she still had and she knew without a doubt that he was messing it up. A part of her glad that once she went inside she was just going to head to bed anyway.

As well as hoping maybe Norah or Tess didn't notice her messed up hair but if they did she'd just tell them she drifted off while Taylor drove her home. Surely that would be good enough of an excuse right?

It seemed good to her but she wasn't sure if she was in a position to judge anything right. Not when her mouth was around Taylor's cock and her own vagina was beginning to ache again.

Her body getting turned on more by this then it had from holding his cock. That or it was the thrill of doing this in such a public place.

All of the fears she had before at the back of her mind currently. Like somehow she was a completely different Avery who didn't care about getting in trouble or rules.

Not that she usually cared but when it came to breaking the law she did and she was sure public sex was breaking the law.

"You're doing so good Avie," Taylor moaned as he pulled on her hair some more. The action creating goosebumps on her skin. "Such a good little cock sucker for only doing it once," he muttered out.

His words once again creating a fire in Avery as she kept moving her mouth on him. Taking him deeper into her mouth each time she moved down, swearing that she heard him hiss some when she did that. As if he hadn't been expecting her to do it.

But why else mention what she had done to Zac? He had to know that would spurn her on. Everything with Zac seemed to sit a fire under her in good or bad ways.

The good being at least she was being sexual. Her sex life was improving greatly now but the bad was she was doing it out of jealousy and that would probably bite her in the ass somehow.

Everything would eventually crumble because that was just how her life worked. 

Moaning around Taylor when he found a way to finally hold her head still, Avery closed her eyes tighter as he began to fuck her mouth now. Not sure what had made him want to take control from her so fast or so easy but she liked it. She liked letting him have this control and he kind of deserved it for earlier when he had gone down on her in the bathroom.

Making her feel so good and giving her a nice orgasm.

"I'm close," he finally spoke again as his hips kept moving as he continued to fuck her mouth. "And you're going to swallow me," he told her in a tone that let her know he was being serious.

He wanted her to swallow him.

"I'm going to take my hand out of your hair but you're going to be good to me Pippi and swallow everything I give you," he told her as his movements seemed to slow.

His hand finally moving away from her hair and it wasn't long after that, that he indeed did come. Avery doing what he wanted and swallowing every drop of come that he gave her. Only moving away once she was sure he was done and after she had she just sat in the seat of his car.

Having to catch her breath before she could move again as well as making a mental note to hurry and get to her room when she got inside. Needing to get herself off before she went to bed.

"How did you know?" Avery asked once she had caught her breath, not even daring to look at Taylor but she could hear him adjusting himself. Heard the zip on his jeans being done back up.

"Know what Pippi?" Taylor asked curiousness in his tone and she knew if she turned to face him she'd see just as much curiousness on his face as well.

"That Zac was the person I gave a blow job to when he was drunk?" Avery questioned again and this time she finally did turn to face him. Wanting to see his face. "When I told you about that blow job I could have meant anyone so how did you know it was Zac?"

Even with what little moonlight was coming into his car, Avery saw it when Taylor's cheeks turned pink. Like he was embarrassed on being called out or maybe even guilty.

Though if it were guilt Avery had no clue why he'd be guilty of something.

"Zac told me," Taylor confessed and his words shocked Avery because she had always thought he'd been too drunk to even realize what had happened. He'd never brought it up with her and he'd just gone acting as if it never happened. "He thought it was Tess. It's what started his crush on her in the first place."

Listening to Taylor, Avery was sure her heart broke more than it ever had before if that were possible. Knowing that Zac had thought what she had done had been Tess and that it was the catalyst for his crush on her...it was just disheartening and yet it also made sense.

Because that had been when he seemed to get more interested in her sister. After the blow job Avery had given him while he was drunk and somehow that had bit her in the ass. In ways she hadn't realized until now, years down the road.

"Oh," Avery stated softly and before she could even give Taylor a chance to say anything Avery slipped out of his car and headed to her apartment. Tears welling up in her eyes and any arousal she had felt from just minutes ago was gone.

All she felt was her broken heart and the fact that without even meaning too she had screwed herself over when it came to Zac liking her as more than a friend. As well as maybe feeling a bit betrayed that he couldn't tell her and Tess apart even if he had been drunk.

Slowing when she reached the door of her apartment Avery stopped when she saw Zac sitting outside by the door. His head shooting up when he saw her and the moment he did his forehead crinkled again. His brown eyes darkening as he stood up fast.

Faster than she had seen him stand up in a long time. The last time had to have been last year when a random guy had slapped her ass at the diner where Tess worked. Avery had been walking back to the table she was sharing with Zac and the man had just slapped her ass.

Zac having shot out of their booth and threatening the guy within an inch of his life for what he'd done to his best friend.

"You're crying," Zac stated softly as he walked to meet Avery were she was at. "Please tell me Taylor didn't do anything to make you cry. I know he can be an asshole at times."

Avery shook her head as she wiped at her eyes, not even realizing she had been crying.

"Taylor didn't do anything," she told him and it was the truth. She wasn't crying because of Taylor. She was crying because of Zac. "I just..I don't know I'm emotional right now," she lied as she looked away from his gaze. "Why are you here though, I mean at my apartment and especially outside?" she questioned deciding to change the subject.

Hoping he didn't notice it.

"Nice subject change Avie," Zac told her with disappointment in his voice and she still kept ignoring his gaze. "But I'm here because I wanted to make sure you did get home safe."

Blushing Avery finally looked at him not surprised at the disappointment on his face. "I told you I'd text you when I made it home safely," she sighed as she shook her head. "Do you not trust me to do that?"

"No," Zac stated bluntly. "Not when you're being weird lately," he continued as he stepped closer to her. "You're my friend Avery and I just...I worry about you."

Sighing Avery rolled her eyes, "I know that," she conceded. "But I'm fine or I will be," she said because she was sure that someday she would be okay. It would just take a while to get to okay.

"I hope so," Zac told her as he reached out to pull her into a hug and Avery let him because it felt nice being in his arms. "You're my best friend and I love you," he spoke softly and Avery hated how hearing him say the last words hurt because she knew he didn't mean it like she wanted him too.

"I love you too Zac," Avery muttered as she let her eyes fall shut. "And I promise I'll stop being weird eventually," she added on and she hoped what she said was true.

For her own sake.


	6. It's Affection Always, You're Gonna See It Someday

Walking to her car after a late afternoon class the next day, Avery stopped in her tracks when she heard someone calling her name or no, it wasn't her name. It was that damn nickname Taylor had given her and as she turned she wasn't surprised at all to see Taylor coming towards her.

"Pippi," Taylor said breathlessly like he had ran to catch up to her. "I've been looking for you all day," he told her with a charming smile that Avery even hated to admit was charming.

She hated to admit anything about Taylor was charming when he was so annoying most of the time.

"Looking for me?" Avery questioned as she crossed her arms over her chest, her brown eyes just looked at him suspiciously. "Why?" she asked not sure why he wanted to see her.

He'd seen her last night when he'd gone down on her in the bathroom at the coffeehouse and then when she'd given him a blow job in his car. 

If he expected another sexual favor from her he was sadly mistaken. But then again maybe he was done wanting those, after all he'd already broken his one time rule with her and there was no way he'd do it a third time. That would just be unlike the Taylor Hanson she knew.

The Taylor Hanson who had changed after Natalie had broken up with him. Become a man who as he put it was going to hook up with every girl he could and never fuck around with the same girl twice.

Avery had thought he'd just been saying that because that was sorta the reason Natalie had given him when they broke up. She had wanted to see other boys and so Avery had just thought he was saying that to hurt Natalie but then he had become what he said he would.

Taylor looked down away from Avery's gaze and he was blushing, much like he had last night when Avery had confronted him on how he'd known about the blow job she had given Zac in tenth grade.

A question she had almost wished she hadn't asked now that she had the answer.

"To see if you were okay," Taylor answered as he looked back up at her finally. "You left my car in a hurry and when I had breakfast with Zac this morning at the diner he basically jumped all over me. He thought I did something to you," he spoke with a frown and just his whole demeanor right now was not the Taylor Hanson that Avery had grown up with.

It was so unlike him that she was sure if anyone could see him they'd think he was sick.

Now it was Avery who looked away as she uncrossed her arms, running a hand through her hair which she had kept down today.

"Did you tell him you didn't do anything?" she asked softly because he hadn't and she'd told Zac as much last night but obviously he hadn't believed her.

He'd still assumed Taylor had done something when really she had been crying because of Zac. Her idiot best friend who believed her sister had gone down on him when she hadn't. His belief in that creating his crush on Tess and causing Avery years of heartbreak. 

Heartbreak that was made worse now that they finally seemed to be starting a relationship.

"Yeah, but you know Zac and he would believe it's all my fault," Taylor told her and what he left unsaid was anyone would think that with the reputation he had now.

"Can you blame him Taylor?" Avery asked a bit accusingly because Taylor couldn't be that dumb. He had to know why people had a hard time believing him sometimes.

He wasn't the best guy..he was no leading man material for romance stories that was for sure. Not that Avery read many but she did watch a lot of romantic TV shows. It was just because it was better watching angst TV than living an angsty life which she did do.

Maybe she should switch to comedy TV shows and make her life easier...a bit anyway.

Taylor shook his head as he looked away from Avery then, "No," he admitted softly like he was ashamed of his reputation which so was not the Taylor she knew. He was never ashamed of anything. "But are you okay?" he asked again seeming to remember why he had tracked her down.

Heaving a sigh Avery shrugged her shoulders, "No," she said mimicking his words from seconds ago. "How am I supposed to be when I find out the reason Zac even likes Tess is because of me? I started my own damn heartbreak mess without meaning too."

After she spoke Avery watched as Taylor just made a face she couldn't read but it was one she felt like meant he didn't like that she was upset over the Zac thing.

Of course he'd be like that, it wasn't like he understood what it was to pine after someone for so long, even if there was a girl he wanted. If he just told her he'd probably be able to get her. No one ever turned down Taylor, though Avery doubted his ability to stay faithful to whoever it was he wanted even if he had been faithful to Natalie.

That was before he had changed thanks to her.

"My brother isn't worth you feeling like you are," Taylor stated confirming what she knew. "Even if you love him," he added on with a harsh sarcasm and a roll of his eyes.

The harshness of his words surprising her. 

"Maybe he isn't but I feel the way I do," Avery shrugged again as she looked away from Taylor. "Now are you done interrogating me so I can leave?" 

Taylor only sighed but he nodded his head, "I'm done," he told though he looked like he wanted to say more but he didn't. He just stared at her briefly before turning on his heels and walking away first.

Avery watching as he left not even surprised by the fact that he'd only gotten a few feet away from her and some girl was already at his side chatting his ear off like they were best friends.

It was either a girl he'd fucked once who didn't know his rule. A rule it seemed he liked to break with Avery or a girl who wanted to fuck him, would probably fuck him soon at this rate with how she looked and dressed. She was Taylor's type anyway. The typical hot pretty girl who had been popular in high school.

It was the type he was bound to marry with his own looks.

Not that Avery liked to admit she found his looks attractive but they were. He could be a model if he wanted instead of a student studying architecture. 

Shaking her head Avery moved then as well, finally finishing the walk to her car. Getting in her car she started it up and drove off, turning the music up as she did because now after her talk with Taylor she had so many more confusing thoughts in her head. The most confusing one was the fact that she wasn't sure why she didn't like the idea of Taylor hooking up with the girl he'd been talking too after he left her.

Avery usually never had any cares about who Taylor had sex with or fooled around with. What was so different now?

He was just an annoying boy. Zac's annoying brother.

He was the guy who'd seen her naked and came on her. He was the guy she let go down on her in a public bathroom and then she'd gone down on him in his car hours later. 

But those were all just flukes, things that just happened because she had either been drunk or upset about Zac or just wanting to return the favor. Yet none of that was any reason for her to care about who else Taylor hooked up with.

They weren't dating and they never would be dating. He was free to do what he wanted and she had no reason to care whatsoever.

*****

"You busy?" a voice asked Avery as a knock sounded on her door and Avery turned her head to see Norah standing there. Not really surprised because it was only her and Norah here right now.

Tess was off at work and wouldn't be home until late. Somehow despite a busy college schedule Tess was able to juggle it and late nights at the diner where she worked, Avery knowing if it was her that she probably wouldn't be able to survive.

She'd either just be dead or failing school.

"Not anymore, I just finished homework," Avery told her as she watched as Norah slipped into her room. "What brings you to visit me?" she asked teasingly as she closed the textbook she had been using to help with her homework as Norah walked farther into her room and towards the bed.

"I'm just wondering if you are okay?" Norah asked with a raised eyebrow and Avery wanted to roll her eyes. Was everyone going to ask her that today?

"Why are you asking me that?" Avery questioned her wondering if Zac had said anything to her about last night. He'd asked Taylor but then again he thought Taylor had been the cause of why she had been upset.

Norah just gave Avery a look like she should know why she was asking her what she had. "It's just with Tess and Zac, I know it has to be bothering you and this is me asking not to tease you or anything. How are you handling it?" 

Sighing Avery blushed almost feeling kind of dumb at asking why Norah was asking her that. Of course it was about that, of course Zac hadn't told her anything.

Why would he? Despite being his best friend clearly she really wasn't his main priority no matter what he said. Tess was that for him and had been for years.

"I'm not handling it," Avery admitted truthfully as her blush grew. "Most days I just like to pretend it isn't happening at all and hoping this is one big dream," she said with a small frown. "But hopefully I'll get better, especially if this lasts long term."

"Do you think it will?"

Pausing at that question Avery had to look away from Norah, not entirely sure how to answer. It wasn't like Tess was known for long term relationships but then again Tess could be unpredictable. She wasn't a romantic at heart like Avery was. 

"Knowing my luck, yes," Avery nodded her head frowning when Norah who was now sitting beside her, pulled her into her and the room fell silent as her best friend and roommate just held her.

It was nice and it took her mind off things for now at least. It was nice and at least she had someone besides Taylor she could talk too about this because it wasn't like she could tell Tess and she certainly couldn't tell Zac. 

So Norah it was...and Taylor when things weren't getting sexual. Not that they would ever get sexual again even if she did end up taking him up on the offer to go to his place and watch Dawson's Creek when Tess and Zac went on their next date. She would just have to resist him if he came on to her.

Because being weak was not helping her and it certainly wasn't helping her with the situation she was in with Zac and Tess and god if anyone found out what was going on between her and Taylor..if Zac found out...those were ideas that she was terrified of because she knew she'd be judged.

Knew her friends would judge her for being just another one of Taylor's many notches in his bedpost and Zac well he'd probably freak out and that wouldn't be good.

So yeah, she'd have to get better in saying no. Just like she needed to get better about handling Zac and Tess dating.


	7. I Found The Devil I Found Him In A Lover

"How come you aren't telling me where you are going?" Norah asked as she looked at Avery after Avery had came out of her bedroom, dressed so that she could head to Taylor's to watch Dawson's Creek with him again and do her best to forget that Zac and Tess were on their second date.

Another date in which Tess had asked to borrow the skirt that Avery had worn a few days ago. Said Zac had raved about it to her and she wanted to wear it since he liked it.

Avery almost feeling like Tess was trying to become her so that Zac would like her which was silly. Zac liked Tess because he had thought Avery was her so it should be Avery who was doing the changing into her sister routine. Not the other way around.

"I told you I'm hanging out with a friend," Avery shrugged not sure she'd classify Taylor as her friend. She wasn't sure what she'd called him after what they'd been doing together lately.

Maybe she'd just keep referring to him as the thorn in her side.

Norah rolled her eyes before crossing her arms on her chest, "But which friend?" she asked clearly wanting more details than Avery was willing to provide. "What if you aren't back by the time Zac and Tess come back and he asks where you are. What do I say then?"

"Just tell him what you know, that I am hanging out with a friend," Avery sighed as she went to grab the DVD. "Zac doesn't have to know every person that I hang out with," she spoke not sure if she was telling Norah or herself that.

Zac wasn't her keeper and she wasn't his. If anyone was Zac's keeper now it was Tess not her.

"Fine," Norah said though she wasn't satisfied. Avery could tell from the annoyed tone she had in her voice which almost made Avery feel guilty that she wasn't telling Norah things but she knew she couldn't.

It wasn't like Avery and Taylor casually hung out, in fact, Avery had never been alone with Taylor in his apartment so tonight would be a first for that and how would she answer all the questions she knew Norah would have.

She couldn't so it was easier to just not tell her the truth either.

Forcing a smile Avery soon turned away and left the apartment before Norah could say more. Avery hating the nerves building in her stomach thanks to reality kicking in about this being the first time she spent in Taylor's apartment without anyone else there. It was going to be just the two of them and she prayed to God that she had the will in her to say no if he tried anything.

They really did need to stop crossing the blurry lines they were creating.

*****

Avery who had made it to Taylor's apartment was just about to raise her hand to knock but before she could the door was being opened and she paused, watching as Taylor who was in his doorway paused as well. A girl by his side and for the second time that night Avery had to force a smile as she came face to face with the girl from a few days ago.

The girl who it was clear wanted Taylor and from the way she had dressed tonight she obviously thought she would be getting him. Though as she spotted Avery standing in front of her, her face screwed up some, into a look that Avery was sure would kill her if looks could indeed kill people.

"Meg," Taylor began as he cut the thick tension built silence by speaking. "This is Avery," he said as he turned his gaze to Avery and it was then that Avery caught the own strained smile on Taylor's face. "Avery this is Meg. She's in one of my classes and she came over because she needed help with one of her designs that she got stuck on," he said as if he was explaining himself.

Like he was afraid that Avery suspected more had happened and maybe she did. She really doubted they had been just looking at designs, not with the way Meg was dressed. Her too tight dress that showed off her cleavage well. The makeup that suited her perfectly.

Though speaking of makeup her lipstick didn't appear smeared or anything. Then again she could have reapplied it before deciding to leave.

Nodding her head Avery kept her forced smile, "Nice to meet you Meg," she said though even to her ears her words sounded too sweet. Meg could probably see she wasn't pleased to meet her.

Not like this anyway.

"Yeah, same," Meg finally spoke and her words were just as sweet as Avery's. The air growing more thick with tension. "You're still coming to my party tomorrow right, Tay?" she asked and as she turned to look at Taylor again.

Avery having to bit her lip to keep from laughing at the way it seemed all the color had drained from Taylor's face.

"Y..y..yeah," Taylor nodded his head and the way he tumbled over his words surprised Avery and if Meg had noticed she didn't do anything.

Instead she seemed to go back to being genuinely happy and bubbly, almost acting like she had won something and without another word she walked off. Leaving Taylor and Avery alone in the hallway of his apartment complex.

The air not as thick as it was with tension. But tension was still there especially when Taylor looked back at her, the color having not come back all the way to his face yet.

"Oh Taylor," Avery sighed as she came into his apartment not even waiting for him to invite her inside. "You probably shouldn't set up your newest notch on your bedpost to be at your house when the girl you've been fooling around with for days is coming over," she told him listening as he finally shut the door once she was inside.

Though she kept her back to him, not wanting to look at him as she talked because she hated the way she said the words she did. She hated the small hint of jealousy that was there.

Avery was not jealous of what Taylor did with any girl that he wanted to fool around with. He had a right to do whatever he wanted or whoever he wanted.

She wasn't his keeper either just like she wasn't Zac's.

"We didn't...I didn't sleep with her," Taylor defended as he walked behind her and before she could get much farther into his house, Taylor had grabbed a hold of her waist and turned her so that she was facing him now.

Avery feeling her breath catch some at how close he was to her.

"She showed up while I was in the middle of making dinner for us and claimed she needed help with a design we have to do," Taylor explained before Avery could talk again. "She didn't though, not really because she's been trying to get with me for weeks now and I knew this was her trying again. I did my best to get her out before you showed up but I guess I failed."

Raising her eyebrows at his words Avery wanted to not believe him but the way he was acting not like his usually cocky self, she had no choice but to believe he was telling the truth.

He hadn't fooled around with Meg and he wanted her to know it.

"You made us dinner?" Avery questioned knowing that shouldn't have been the first thing out of her mouth but it was. It seemed it was the only thing her brain had been stuck on that he had said.

Taylor had made them dinner instead of ordering cheap take out and she hadn't even known Taylor could cook. God knew Zac couldn't.

"Yeah," Taylor replied though he made no effort to move. Both of them stuck in place where they were. "You believe me about Meg right?" he questioned and there he was again wanting her to know he was telling the truth.

There was nothing that happened between him and Meg, no matter how desperate Meg had been.

"Yeah," Avery told him as she gave him a head nod. "This isn't a date right?" she asked turning the tables on him and asking her own question. "I mean you cooked us dinner and this feels like a date," she spoke as she felt her cheeks turning hot.

This couldn't be a date.

"No," Taylor spoke too fast for Avery's liking. "Where you jealous when you thought I had slept with Meg?" he questioned her again and once again Avery's breath caught as Taylor walked closer to her. 

Avery having to move away some which caused her to back into the wall. Taylor soon boxing her against it with his arms so she couldn't escape now. She'd have to answer him.

"No," Avery lied as she answered almost as fast as Taylor had her.

A smirk playing on Taylor's lips then, "I have wine with the food. Went out and bought a bottle of non cheap wine," he told her as he let his head move closer to hers.

Close enough now that Avery swore he was going to kiss her. Her lips almost tingling at the thought of it, wanting to feel his lips against her own. Despite the fact that she had denied him that the times when they had hooked up.

"Funny, making a crack on my wine taste like you did last week," Avery teased him before reaching out and pushing him away from her. "Now I'm going to put the DVD down and we can eat and then watch it," she told him acting like this was her house and she had every right to be in charge.

Then again he had done the same at her own apartment so he could consider this payback.

*****

Letting out a yawn after they had finished the second from last episode of Season One of Dawson's Creek, Avery leaned back against the couch as she watched Taylor turn the DVD off.

"You said we were going to finish the season," she spoke with a bit of a whine to her voice. "We were so fucking close to finishing."

"You're tired," Taylor told her as he looked at her and she noticed that he looked as tired as she felt.

They had probably done this to themselves in the end with the pasta he had made and then drinking the wine with it. They had continued drinking the wine even after eating so both of them were tipsy again too, though Avery swore she wasn't as bad as she had been last week at least.

She had that going for her it seemed.

"And you're a party pooper," Avery told him as she stood up from the couch. "But it's your house and your rules," she said as she picked up her dirty plate and empty wine glass. Taking both into the kitchen.

Listening at Taylor's footsteps as he followed behind her.

"I should head home though," Avery sighed as she put her dishes in the sink. "Though maybe I can do your dishes first to thank you for having me over," she said hating that at least being here had made her forget why she had came.

To get away from her apartment and forget that Tess and Zac had gone on a date. A fact she had temporarily forgotten until now.

"Or you could stay and I could do the dishes tomorrow," Taylor spoke his words making Avery swallow hard and as she opened her mouth to object Taylor shook his head. "You're tired already and have alcohol in your system. I'm not gonna be responsible for you driving and getting hurt. I don't want Zac to kill me if he ever found out."

"So you want me to stay so Zac doesn't kill you?" Avery questioned with a raised eyebrow. "Not because you have other things in mind?"

Taylor only smirked as he leaned against the door frame of the kitchen and it felt normal to see Taylor being cocky again. Unlike how he had been when she first showed up which had been too weird for her to even comprehend.

"I had good intentions behind my request Pippi," he told her as he held up one of his hands in surrender. "Nothing funny for me. I'll even sleep on the couch so you can have my bed all to yourself."

"No, we can share a bed," Avery told him figuring just sharing a bed would be okay. "I will need something to sleep in though."

"I think I have a few t-shirts you can wear," Taylor told her and all Avery could do was slowly smile because that meant she'd just have panties underneath them.

Taylor would really have to try his best to keep in line if he was going to not try anything funny.

*****

Taking a deep breath as she looked down at herself after she had changed out of her clothes Avery frowned at the fact that the shirt had barely covered her panties.

A small part of her instantly regretting that she had chosen to wear the black lacy panties that she had bought as a gift to herself on her last birthday. Just something to make her feel sexy and right now she felt far from sexy in them. 

She felt self-conscious and afraid of what Taylor would say when he saw them on her. Not to mention how much harder it would be for him not to try anything which meant she'd have to be strong if he did. She'd have to remain firm and tell him no, that they weren't going to cross anymore lines.

They had crossed enough already.

Leaving the bathroom Avery slowly walked down to Taylor's room, stopping when she made it to the doorway and saw him in his bed already in nothing but a pair of boxer briefs, wearing a pair of reading glasses as he read some magazine on architecture.

It wasn't a magazine she'd read but Taylor seemed engrossed in it enough that he barely noticed he presence and the sight of him lost in reading did something funny to her heart it seemed.

Made the beat feel like it had gotten all out of rhythm.

Finally after a few minutes Taylor looked up from his magazine and Avery felt her cheeks growing hot at the way he looked at her. The way one corner of his mouth quirked up.

An aching sensation developing between Avery's legs. One Avery did her best to try and will away because she didn't want it.

"That shirt fits you nicely," Taylor said as he laid his magazine down on the table by his bed, soon removing his glasses and putting them on top of the magazine. "Really fucking well," he added on with a bit of a seductive edge.

Avery rolled her eyes as she walked to Taylor's bed, slipping in beside him. "You promised no funny business," she reminded him as they locked eyes.

"I think we both know I was lying," Taylor told her and before she had time to reply his arm was draping around her, pulling her into him. "I like the funny business better than just sleeping."

"Of course you do," Avery muttered out as Taylor's lips found their place on her neck. Her eyes falling shut as she felt resistance leave her body if it had even been there at all. "Do you know anything other than sex when it comes to girls?" she questioned as he nipped at her neck right as his hand went to rest on her thigh.

The aching between her legs getting worse. That wasn't where she wanted his hand at all.

"I know how to woo one," Taylor spoke as his breath hit her neck and Avery shivered at that, the aching only getting worse which caused her to move her hips into his.

His hand sliding farther up her thigh, so close to the edge of her panties but not quite there yet.

"And is there one you want to woo?" Avery asked him remembering what Zac had said a few days ago. How Taylor had been raving to him for months about a girl he wanted long term. "Is that why you keep coming back to me? Because I'm the test subject to see if you can get back in the saddle again and woo the girl you want?"

Taylor pulled away from Avery, looking down at her as if she was crazy, "Is that what you think?" he questioned with a raised eyebrow. "That I'm using you?"

"Zac said there was a girl you've been talking about for months now that time we saw you with McKinley," Avery answered as she locked eyes with him. "And before that you had hinted that there may have been someone you wanted."

Furrowing his brow Taylor just kept looking at her, the look on his face almost unreadable to Avery now. 

"I'm not using you as a test subject," Taylor finally spoke though he didn't deny that there was some girl he wanted. In fact he ignored that bit of what Avery had said altogether.

Avery gave him a skeptical look at his words not sure if she believed him. Especially if he had ignored her about the girl subject.

"I'm not using you," Taylor said more firmer now and Avery closed her eyes when his hand which was finally at the edge of her panties pushed them aside.

His fingers brushing at her wet flesh so tenderly. Much more tenderly than she sometimes even touched herself and god did it do things to her.

"Can I show you that I'm not using you?" he asked her and as he spoke his lips came so close to her own. They were off to the side but just barely and as she bucked her hips up as he brushed his fingers against her again. His kissed her and she fought the urge to turn her head.

She fought the urge to have her lips meet his in a kiss. Her lips tingling again at the thought of kissing him.

"And how are you going to do that?" Avery asked instead of giving him an answer her eyes opening again as she looked up at him teasingly when she saw the look on his face. "How do you plan on showing me that Tay?" she questioned surprised at her use of a nickname on him.

She rarely did that for anyone yet here she was letting that name slip so easily out of her mouth.

Taylor smirking as he heard her words, "I was thinking I could eat you out properly," he told her as two of his fingers slipped so easily inside of her wetness. Her hips bucking up at that. "Take all the time I couldn't take in that bathroom at the coffeehouse."

"Please," Avery breathed out hating how desperate she sounded but it was hard not to be desperate when he kept teasing her with his fingers. Making them go from fast to slow. "Please god please," she begged out hating it when she heard the faint chuckle that he let out.

"I never knew you were such a needy whore Pippi," Taylor muttered as his lips went to her ear and Avery shuddered as he added a third finger inside of her. "I think the lack of sex in your life was getting to you," he teased before nipping at her earlobe. "But if you want it that badly then I will do it," he told her and it took all Avery had not to let out a loud moan.

Knew if she moaned loudly he'd know just how much she was enjoying this. Not just his fingers inside of her but the way he was talking to her. 

Feeling his lips work their way down to her neck, Avery tilted her head to the side. Giving him better access, her eyes once again falling shut because between his lips on her neck and his fingers inside of her she swore she was going to die. She was going to die and go to heaven from too much pleasure.

Though what a way to die really.

"Tay," she breathed out finally after a while. "Please stop teasing," she spoke and god there was that needy pitch to her voice. She was begging again and she was she it was making his ego grow.

Taylor only laughed though he did slip his fingers out of Avery's embarrassingly wet cunt. Avery letting a moan slip past her as he finally pushed the t-shirt of his that she was wearing up. 

Avery moving up to help him slip it off her and once it was gone, Avery let her hand go to rest on his cheek as she laid back down. Giving him a small smile. "Can you kiss me?" she asked not even thinking over her words. "Please."

Giving a slight nod at her words, Taylor wordlessly leaned in, his lips pressing against her own in a kiss that was slow and languid. Like he wanted to take his time and memorize what he was doing. Avery wanting to complain because again he was delaying what she wanted but she didn't complain.

Mainly because while he was delaying what she wanted he was also giving her something she had wanted all night since she first showed up and he had her pressed against the wall.

His lips were on her own and oddly it didn't feel wrong, like she had thought it would. Not that she had ever really thought of kissing him before tonight.

When he finally pulled away Avery looked up at him breathless, knowing her cheeks as well as her whole body was probably as flushed as his.

"I think I regret not letting you do that sooner," Avery told him as she laughed some, Taylor laughing with her, his head coming to rest on her breast which wasn't a bad feeling. "You're an amazing kisser," she admitted and she knew everything tonight was probably stroking his ego.

He'd be hard to be around for the next few days. She'd probably be best avoiding him.

"Did you just compliment me Pippi?" Taylor questioned as he raised his head to look up at her. "I think that is one of the very few compliments you've ever given me."

"It will also be the last compliment you get from me as well if you don't hurry up and get down between my legs soon," Avery told him trying to sound stern though it came out more playful.

Taylor shook his head with a roll of his eyes but instead of say anything he leaned in to kiss her again. This kiss not lasting as long and instead of pulling away he let his lips work their way down her cheek and then onto her neck. 

Avery's eyes falling shut the farther that Taylor kissed down her body. Her whole body feeling like it was being set on fire in the places he kissed.

It was a feeling she wasn't used to but it was one she liked. The burn didn't bother her much it seemed.

When Taylor finally made it between her legs Avery opened her eyes again, watching as Taylor lifted her legs and put them over his shoulder before leaning in and finally licking at her. 

Avery no longer able to hold off the loud moan that escaped her as she let her hand go down to tangle in his hair. Her hips lifting up some into him as he kept licking at her and every so often even kissing her down there.

"You're so good at this," Avery spoke complimenting him in ways again.

Her head falling back against the pillow as he slipped two fingers back inside of her. Using them to fuck her as his tongue and mouth also worked on her as well.

*****

Catching her breath as Taylor moved to lay beside her Avery looked up at him with a raised eyebrow. "Do you want me too help you with your problem?" she asked her breathing still a little heavy. "I wouldn't mind sucking your cock again," she confessed with a faint blush to her cheek.

She knew there was no way she could blame alcohol now for what she was saying. She hadn't drank enough like when they had first started doing what they were doing.

"As much as I would love you sucking my cock, I think I'm good and you're tired," Taylor smirked as he leaned in to peck at her lips. The action surprising Avery because she hadn't expected it.

They were no longer fooling around right now so it wasn't like he had to kiss her.

"I may be tired but I'd still suck your cock," Avery told him as she leaned up on her elbow. Her hand going to rest right above the waistband of his boxer briefs. "Can I at least watch you get yourself off?" she asked before batting her eyelashes hoping he'd at least give her that.

She wanted him to get a happy ending like she had tonight and she wanted to watch him get it.

"You really want to see my cock that badly don't you?" Taylor questioned as he reached down to slip his underwear down Avery involuntarily licking her lips after he had done so. "Just like you really want to suck it that badly too," he added on with a laugh as his hand wrapped around his own cock.

"Maybe tomorrow," he muttered out around a moan as he began to stroke himself and again Avery licked her lips.

She hoped he kept that promise in letting her suck his cock tomorrow. Then after that she'd go back to avoiding him and trying to be stronger in keeping them from crossing anymore lines.


	8. When You're Running Through Me I Get Pulled In All Directions

Waking the next morning Avery opened her eyes as she made a confused face at first because this wasn't her room. She wasn't in her room and as she turned over in bed and saw Taylor sleeping beside it her it was like last night hit her like a train wreck.

She'd came over to drink with him while Tess and Zac had gone out again and they had drank and watched Dawson's Creek again after eating a dinner that Taylor had fixed. The whole night feeling more like a date than Avery had cared to admit.

Especially when she remembered what had happened after Taylor had declared they were done watching the show and had refused to let her leave because of how much she had drank and how tired she was. A blush growing on her cheeks as she swore she could almost still feel what his lips had felt like against her cunt last night.

Just like she swore she could remember what it felt like to finally kiss him as well. She'd broken down her walls and allowed him to finally kiss her and god had he. He'd kissed her in ways she hadn't expected him too and in the end she wasn't sure why it had done such things to her.

Taylor wasn't the boy that Avery wanted kissing her. She wanted his brother to kiss her again, had wanted that so badly ever since the blow job and she knew it would never happen but again a girl could dream and none of her dreams had included kissing Taylor.

None of them had included her begging to suck his cock either and she had done that last night too after she had reached her end thanks to his mouth. Though he hadn't let her, promising that she could do it today and it was that thought that caused a smirk to settle on Avery's lips.

Chewing her lip as she watched Taylor continue to sleep and as she moved, she did so softly, hoping that she didn't wake him as she pushed the covers down. A small part of Avery glad that Taylor had fallen asleep nude after letting her watch him jerk off.

The compromise they had made since he wouldn't allow her to give him a blow job.

Reaching out slowly after the covers were down, Avery let her hand wrap around Taylor's cock as she started to stroke it. Loving the feeling as his cock came alive in her hand. The way it twitched every so often making her lick her lips because she wanted to taste him so badly.

Wanted him in her mouth more than she had wanted anything in a while.

When she heard Taylor let out a moan, Avery moved her eyes to look at his face. Not in the least bit surprised to see him awake and a smirk on that stupid gorgeous face of his.

A face she had no rights finding as gorgeous as she did when it was his brother she was in love with.

"I think this is the best wake up call I've had in a long time," he told her with a small moan as they locked eyes. Avery's blush coming back in full force. "You're hand around my cock, stroking me to hardness is like heaven."

"And you're being cheesy as hell," Avery retorted as she slowed her hand movements down just to spite him for how cheesy he was being with his words.

Even if she had liked his cheesiness more than she'd admit.

Taylor rolled his eyes as he moved his hips some with the movements of her hand now, "I'd say anything to get you to suck my cock faster," he told her as his voice went lower and Avery swore her cheeks got hotter and she felt an ache between her legs.

An ache she didn't need because she wasn't the one who was going to get off today and she really didn't want to be on edge until she got back home and could take care of herself.

"Want that mouth of yours around me already."

"Yeah well, you don't have to use cheesy lines to make that happen," Avery retorted with a playful roll of her eyes and before she could second guess herself she leaned down, taking him in her mouth.

As her hand fell away she closed her eyes as she let her mouth work up to the pace that her hand had been going on his cock. Loving the sound of his moans.

Moans which had gotten louder now that she had replaced her hand with her mouth.

"God you're so good at this Avie," Taylor muttered out as his hands went to her hair and now that her hair wasn't in a bun he had more of it to grab onto it seemed.

Avery feeling goosebumps as well as the aching between her legs getting worse. Not having realized until now that hair pulling may have been a thing for her.

She really was learning new stuff about herself every time she fooled around with him it seemed. Like she liked to let him have control but she did on rare occasions like to have it herself and now she realized she was into hair pulling. 

But just because she was learning new things that didn't mean she had to keep doing this with Taylor. Keeping crossing lines even if her body loved crossing lines with him.

Her brain didn't and neither did her feelings because stuff was getting confusing like how last night really had felt like a date when it shouldn't have.

She wasn't the girl Taylor was going to settle down with and he wasn't the boy she wanted to settle down with. She was using him and despite what he said last night he could have been using her too.

A thought that unsettled Avery more than it should have now, especially with her mouth around his cock and his hands in her hair.

Closing her eyes tighter Avery willed her brain to shut down. Just focus on the task at hand and not any silly thoughts like her complicated feelings.

She didn't need those right now. She could think about them when she went home later and faced her sister, the girl that Zac loved instead of her.

"Look at me Avie," Taylor spoke in a stern voice despite the moan that slipped out after he had spoken. "Going to come soon and I want you looking at me when I do."

Opening her eyes Avery obeyed Taylor, looking up at him as she kept her mouth moving on his cock and it wasn't long after she did that Taylor was coming. Avery not moving until she was sure he was done and after she had all she could do was smile when Taylor beckoned her up with his finger.

"What?" she asked him once she was laying beside him again.

Instead of saying anything to her though Taylor leaned in to kiss her on the lips. Avery's eyes falling shut as she kissed him back. Her body moving into his as she let her arms wrap around his waist. The ache between her legs coming back then and she knew there was no way she could hold off on doing anything to herself until she got home.

Taylor was going to have to help her out.

Pulling away from the kiss Avery looked at him with a raised eyebrow, "I really need to shower and head home but I was wondering if you'd shower with me?" she asked him softly knowing she was blushing again.

Not sure why she was nervous about her question when she'd literally just got done sucking his cock.

"Is that all you want from me Pippi?" Taylor asked her as he reached to brush some hair off her face. "Because I feel like you are propositioning me for something sexual and you should know I'm not that type of girl. I'm a lady," he teased and his teasing wasn't helping her blush.

Avery rolled her eyes before softly hitting Taylor in the stomach, listening as he did an over exaggerated groan after.

"Last I checked you were kind of the college tramp," she retorted which made him laugh before he his lips went to her neck where he kissed at the skin as he worked his lips up towards her ear.

"I guess I am the college tramp," Taylor whispered into her ear as he let his hand slip between her legs as he brushed at her wet flesh. Avery almost regretting that she had slept nude as well. "And I think you want this college tramp to do several dirty things to you in the shower."

"Maybe," Avery moaned out as he brushed his hand against her wet flesh again. "So how about it college tramp? Want to join me in the shower?"

"Yes, always yes," Taylor muttered and before she could respond back his lips were working their way back to hers and once again Avery closed her eyes as she kissed him back.

Knowing as she did so that she was doing an awful job at stopping all these lines that they were crossing.

*****

After the shower with Taylor in which he had gone down on her yet again, Taylor had made them both a breakfast of scrambled eggs and bacon.

It was a breakfast that Avery had ate a little too fast because she was worried about getting home today now that the orgasm highs she had were subsiding. She wasn't sure what she'd tell Norah and Tess when they asked questions and she knew they would. She'd stayed out all night and hadn't even told them who exactly she was staying out with.

She'd have to come up with some lie when she came home and maybe even a fake name because she doubted the excuse of just a friend would work.

Coming out of her thoughts though as she reached her car, Avery got inside and the moment she did she reached for her cell phone, deciding to check it now and see if she had any missed calls or text. It had only just occurred to her during breakfast that she hadn't checked her phone once since she had been at Taylor's.

Then again maybe it was because she didn't want to see another post date text from Tess telling her how amazing the night had been. It would only make Avery's jealousy worse.

Which would be the last thing she needed while at Taylor's or even in his presence. He'd probably have teased her about it or told her Zac wasn't worthy. Two things she hadn't really wanted to hear last night and two things she hated hearing when she was really really in a jealous mood.

Once she had her cell phone turned on and did see the alerts though she was surprised by the number of missed calls and texts she had from Zac and not her sister or even Norah.

Opening each text she read them in order.

 **Zac 11:57**  
The date was horrible tonight. I think I fucked things up with your sister, please text me when you get this. Tried calling you but got voicemail.

 **Zac 12:57**  
It's been an hour...please get back to me Avie. I need my best friend :(.

 **Zac 1:30**  
I'm worried about you now too on top of this stuff that happened with your sister. Called Norah and she said you weren't home. That you left to hang out with a friend and haven't came back. Please get back to me when you can Avery Laurel.

 **Zac 9:30**  
It's now morning or well later morning than my last text. Still no word from you and again I called Norah and she said you weren't home. Instead of calling me can you please come by my place so I can see you are alive in the flesh?

Biting her lip after she read his last text message, Avery put her phone down as she started her car and without even thinking about it she drove to Zac and Gage's place and not just because Zac had asked her too but because she was also curious what had happened on his date with Tess.

What had Zac done to fuck everything up?


	9. A Silence I Can't Ignore

Arriving at Zac's apartment, Avery parked her car and just stared up at his building not sure why she was so nervous to see him but she was. 

What could he have done so wrong on his date with Tess? Tess was his dream girl and had been ever since he had thought it was her that gave him the blow job and not even accounting for the fact that it could have been Avery.

Avery not even sure why he hadn't thought of her.

She would have figured she'd be the obvious choice. After all Tess had never been close to him, not like Avery had been and so it hurt in some way to know that his mind went to Tess. That for some reason Zac couldn't even think of her sexually.

Something that she guessed he and Taylor didn't have in common given everything she was doing with Taylor.

But that was all it was between her and Taylor. It was purely sexual and not romantic, not like how she wanted things with Zac still. The downfall of that being that if they were to ever get romantic he'd have to see her as a sexual being and she doubted that would ever happen. Not when he saw Tess that way.

Which in ways was laughable since she and Tess were identical twins.

Heaving a sigh Avery finally willed herself to get out of her car, heading towards the apartment where Zac lived much quicker than she liked because again her nerves were still there. Her brain or something trying to decode still what Zac had done.

How could he have messed things up with his dream girl?

It still seemed almost impossible to Avery that he had.

Once she reached Zac's door Avery was just about to raise her hand to knock but before she could the door swung open and Avery came face to face with a disheveled looking Zac.

A Zac whose hair was sticking up everywhere and who looked like he had bags under his eyes from a lack of sleep.

"Do you have a sixth sense or something?" Avery questioned hoping her words broke some of whatever tension he had.

That and she wanted to start easy before telling him he looked like shit right now.

"I wish I did," Zac retorted in a not so happy tone, his body moving so that Avery could come inside. "I was just looking out the window and waiting on you to get here. You took an awful long time getting out of your car."

Avery shrugged as she brushed past Zac, "I was trying to rack my brain in deciding how you fucked things up with Tess," she said telling a half truth. He didn't need to know the other things that had been on her mind. "What did you do though, because no offense you look like shit."

Zac snorted at that though it almost sounded bitter and Avery jumped slightly when he slammed the door. A tiny part of her hoping that Gage wasn't home or that would have woken him up.

"I tried to get sexual with her," Zac finally answered after a few minutes of silence and as he spoke Avery was glad that she was now near the futon that Gage and Zac owned because she needed to sit down.

Needed a second to get over Zac trying to have any kind of sex with Tess.

"And I take it, it didn't go well?" she asked him as she swallowed hard, hoping how uncomfortable she was wasn't showing right now.

Shaking his head Zac sat down next to Avery, "No, it went awful," he told her with a frown. "She got all huffy and asked me why I even thought she'd put out on the second date," he explained and there was a hint of confusion in his voice then. "So I brought up something that happened in the past between us and she fucking feigned innocence and so I may have dropped her off all angry and she said if I was going to act like that, she never wanted to see me again."

Swallowing hard again Avery had to look away from Zac when he mentioned what he'd said to Tess and what he brought up. Avery had a sinking feeling what it was and she knew her sister hadn't been faking innocence.

Tess really was innocent but of course by now Tess had to have figured out why Zac messed up. Tess more than likely knew Avery's secret that she had gone down on Zac in high school.

Avery hating the dread she had in facing her sister now because she knew they'd talk about it which meant she'd finally have to tell her sister about her feelings for Zac.

Something that Avery knew was a long time coming.

"What happened in your and my sister's past?" Avery asked him feigning innocence herself but, well, she figured Zac wouldn't take it too well if she just blurted out the truth to him. Not with the way the last few hours had gone for him.

So maybe she'd stay silent and not say anything. Silence always seemed the best and anyway it seemed like Zac wasn't smart enough to put the pieces together anyway. That Tess may have really been innocent and that Avery had been the one who had sucked him off. 

That only proved what Avery knew. Zac didn't see her as a sexual being.

Looking back at Zac finally, Avery saw the blush on his cheeks which made her once again swallow hard.

"Are you sure you really want to know Ave?" Zac asked as he raised his eyebrow now. "It's kind of personal."

Avery took a breath as she thought over her words for a moment. "Yeah," she nodded as she forced a smile. "I mean you already told me a bit more than is normal for a best friend by telling me you tried to have sex with my sister."

Seeing Zac's blush deepen Avery couldn't help but look away as she tried to hide her smirk. Maybe she got a tiny bit of pleasure out of this even if she knew what was wrong and was nervous about that.

Nervous how to tell him the truth and nervous now to face her sister.

"When we were teens Tess gave me a blow job Avie," Zac finally answered his voice soft and low and yeah he was embarrassed to tell Avery this. "I was drunk but I'm pretty sure she was sober. She didn't taste like alcohol when we kissed."

Blushing at the mention of the kiss Avery looked back at Zac as she chewed on her lip. 

"Are you sure it was Tess?" she questioned him knowing she was walking a pretty thin line right now. "You said you were drunk."

Zac let out a laugh at her words though his own blush seemed to remain, "Avery, if it wasn't Tess then that means it would have to have been you and I think I'd know if it were you. I think I'd know my own best friend."

"What would be so funny if it was me?" Avery asked him unable to hide the hurt in her voice and she knew from the way that Zac stopped laughing and looked at her that he was putting the pieces together.

He was realizing too late that it had never been Tess who had gone down on him but her.

"Oh god," Zac muttered out as his blush seemed to leave him quickly. His face going pale. "It was you?" he asked, though his question was more of a statement because of course he knew it was her.

All Avery could do then was nod her head. Not sure if words would even come if she tried to speak. Zac's reaction alone seemed to hurt her more than it should have. After all she knew he didn't see her as a sexual object but now he seemed almost disgusted by the thought and that hurt.

It hurt to know that Zac could have been disgusted about even being remotely sexual with her.

Looking away from him after she nodded, Avery was almost thankful for the silence that seemed to have fallen over them while also cursing it as well because it did nothing for her hurt feelings or her already fragile heart.

A heart it seemed Zac never was aware of that he'd broken so many times and that he kept breaking even without his knowledge.

Yet despite what he did to her heart it seemed Avery was always destined to love him. Because even now her love for him still remained. Wasn't that why it was so easy for him to break her heart?

"How come you never told me this?" Zac asked breaking the silence and Avery turned to face him, seeing that some color had returned to his face. "I spent all these years thinking it was Tess. Telling myself she loved me and it was all for nothing."

Avery shook her head, "It wasn't for nothing, you got her in the end didn't you?" 

"That isn't the point," Zac retorted as he locked eyes with Avery. "I thought she loved me and if..."

"And if what?" Avery asked cutting him off as her voice rose. "If you knew any different you wouldn't have pursued her?" she continued her questioning not even giving him time to answer. "I think we both know that is a lie. You would have done it because in the end I think you wanted it to be her. You never wanted to even entertain the possibility it was me so why should I have told you? Only to get my heart broken when you told me all I was, was a friend to you?"

Instead of saying anything at first Zac stood up from where he had been seated and Avery watched him, feeling a shiver run down her spine at the glare he was now giving her.

"Don't put words in my mouth Avery Laurel," Zac told her sounding as angry as he looked. "It's not fair to me."

"I wasn't putting words in your mouth Zachary Walker," Avery retorted as she too stood up. "Your actions did all the speaking for you. Why else would you assume it was Tess when I was the one who was practically attached to your god damn hip then. I'm the one who has always been the one closer to you. Not her."

Again Zac just fell silent but the glare he was giving her never seemed to go away. It was almost a constant fixture on his face now. One that hurt her to see but also at the same time made her angry.

How dare he get mad at her for telling the truth.

"You know what, Avery just leave," Zac told her as he broke the silence yet again. "I'm not sure I want to see you right now."

"Fine," Avery said her voice turning angry as she moved as fast as she could to get out of Zac's apartment. A part of her not sure if she wanted to see him either right now or maybe ever again.

Not with how angry she was at him.

Getting back in her car once she had made it outside and to her car, she started it up and drove home. Not even caring about the nerves she had in facing Tess now.

She handled Zac and it hadn't gone well so Avery was certain she could face Tess, no matter what happened. After the way things went with Zac she could take anything.

That or her anger was talking for her.


	10. You Can Trust Me Not To Think And Not To Sleep Around

Arriving home angry and upset, Avery parked her car and got out not even caring that she had slammed the door. It was a nice release for her anger or so she thought anyway.

She could pretend that Zac's hand was in the door when she shut it. That made everything better or so she told herself anyway when she knew really, nothing could make this better.

Zac knew the truth now and she had told him her own facts. Facts that he clearly chose to deny because there was no other explanation for why he had assumed it was Tess who had given him the blow job. He'd wanted it to be her and not Avery because he saw Avery as nothing more than a friend.

She'd never be anything more while he had her heart.

Shaking her head she soon unlocked the door of her apartment when she reached it and after she had stepped inside, she paused at the sight of not just Tess on the couch but Norah as well and she knew from the looks they were both giving her that a confrontation was coming.

One that she probably would like about the same as the one she had with Zac, which was, she hated it and she almost wished she had just stayed at Taylor's place.

If she hadn't left then her day wouldn't have been ruined or maybe it still would have. After all as far as she knew he was going to that party tonight that Meg had mentioned. Just the thought of Meg making Avery's anger even worse and she couldn't place why. Meg had done nothing to her.

All Meg had done was clearly want to fuck Taylor and she was allowed to do that. It wasn't like Avery owned Taylor or anything.

"Tess," Avery said as she came out of her thoughts, closing the door behind her. "I figured you'd be at work," she continued not even looking at Norah.

She was hoping if she ignored her friend that this would all go away and that the two of them weren't going to confront her about something. More than likely Zac because Avery had a lingering suspicion that Tess had told Norah about everything.

Tess would have had too because when she came home upset, Norah would have seen it and she would have vented to her and so now that blow job that she gave Zac all of those years ago was no longer her secret.

It was spreading like some domino effect that she wished she could stop.

"I took today off," Tess said as she locked eyes with Avery and Avery swallowed hard because the hurt look on Tess' face mirrored how she felt inside and sometimes seeing her twin was like looking into a mirror, even when her face wasn't showing the emotions but her body was feeling them.

Nodding her head Avery stepped close to the couch where Norah and Tess were. "You took today off?" she questioned deciding to play dumb.

Though she knew soon enough one of them would call her on it and end this whole charade.

"I had too after what happened with Zac last night," Tess told her not once breaking their eye contact. "But you probably know all about it. I'm sure Zac contacted his best friend after our date went to shit. I mean I was right beside Norah both of the fucking times Zac called to see if you were home."

Swallowing hard Avery looked away from Tess then and soon she walked to a chair that was opposite the couch, "I know," she confirmed with a head nod. "I just came back from seeing Zac," she said leaving off the fact that they had argued.

It wasn't Tess' business what had happened between her and Zac. Not when it felt like Tess knew so much already now, Avery hating the raw exposed feeling she had.

"You gave Zac a blow job in high school," Tess stated keeping her voice calm and Avery watched as Norah put a hand on Tess's arm in a comforting manner. "He thought it was me."

"I know that," Avery frowned because it had been bothering her for days now. Making her feel awful for herself, especially when she realized it had brought on years of heartache for herself.

"And you never told your sister?" Norah asked with a raised eyebrow. "That you did it or that Zac thought it was her?"

Looking away Avery chewed on her lip and again she hated that raw exposed feeling that she had right now.

As she looked back at Tess, Avery swallowed hard knowing there was no way she could say that she'd just found out a few days ago herself, that would look weird and cause too many questions so instead she knew she'd have to lie.

Another lie which seemed to be something she was growing accustomed too lately. Lying about who she was sneaking off to see and now lying about how long she had known this information.

"It would be kinda hard to tell her Zac thought it was her when I just found out myself today," Avery lied so easily as she kept her gaze on Tess. Not wanting to look at Norah because she was afraid her friend could see through her lies.

Then again she was afraid Tess would be able to as well.

"Is that what started him liking me?" Tess asked and apparently she had put all the puzzle pieces together, not even acknowledging Avery's words or even if she thought her sister was lying.

Avery nodded her head in answer to that, watching as Tess looked away from her then and Avery hated it because she wanted to see her sister's face. She wanted to know what her twin was thinking because according to what people said she and Tess did not have any of that twin mind reading thing.

At least not usually.

"I wish you had told me this happened," Tess said as she looked back up at Avery. "This explains so much and maybe if I had known..." she started only to sigh as she shook her head and Avery couldn't help wanting to know what she would have said.

"If you had known then what?" Avery asked not being as bitter with Tess as she had been with Zac. Tess was her sister after all and sorta truly innocent. She had never known about the blow job.

It wasn't her fault Zac had assumed wrong.

"I wouldn't have agreed to ever date the boy that my sister is in love with," Tess answered with a sad smile. "That breaks all the girl codes in the book and the sibling codes as well."

Letting out what felt like her first real laugh since things with Zac earlier Avery shook her head, "Codes suck and should always be broken. Especially if you love someone."

"But I didn't love Zac," Tess admitted as she finally moved away from Norah, her whole body language seeming to change now. "Yeah he was nice and the first date was good and I did kind of love having his affections for so long, no matter how much I acted like I didn't I never loved him. I think I only agreed to date him because I was trying to rebound from Vincent," she said, mentioning the boy she had been with briefly over the summer.

All Avery knew about Vincent was that he had been visiting from some European city and her sister seemed to fall madly in love with him and the cliche of having a summer romance.

"It's never good to rebound," Norah added on as she stood from the couch and walked to where Avery was, dropping down in front of her and making Avery furrow her brow. "I wanted to be mad at you, you know for keeping everything from me about Zac and what happened but it's really hard to be mad at you Avery...that and if I'm mad at you I only have Tess to rely on and that would suck."

Both Tess and Avery laughed at that and Avery sighed after her laugh died down. "I'm sorry I never told you or even Tess," she said honestly as she looked at her sister then too. "I just never knew how or even where to start that conversation. I probably should have but it's too late for should haves."

"It is too late for should haves," Tess told her with a shrug. "But I think we all messed up here or at least you and Zac did the most. I was rather innocent here but I forgive you Avie as long as you promise never to keep something that big from me again. Especially when someone could mistake me for you when it comes to sex," she spoke and there was something in her words that made Avery wonder if her sister didn't like sex.

Which would again make Tess the opposite of her in ways because while Avery had never gone all the way she loved what she and Taylor had done already. She loved the way it made her feel when he went down on her or when she went down on him and he got all dirty with her.

She loved letting him have control then and fuck now was not the time to think of Taylor.

"I promise I won't keep something from you like that again," Avery lied again because of course she already was but she couldn't tell people about Taylor or what was going on. She knew they would judge her.

Tess smiled before standing from the couch as well and leaving the living room. Norah and Avery alone together now and they both stared each other down. Avery knowing that while Tess wouldn't question her on where she had been that Norah would.

It was just who her best friend was.

"She may not be nosy," Norah said as she pointed down the hallway where Tess was. "But I am. So where were you last night? I think I deserve to know since it was me Zac kept bothering when he was trying to get a hold of you."

"I was with a friend," Avery sighed knowing she couldn't tell Norah it was Taylor. She'd put the pieces together and really Norah knew enough about her sex life right now.

Avery didn't want to be even more exposed or judged for what she did..or who she did. 

Anyway she feared Norah would make more of this than what it was and what it was, was just two people getting each other off with no strings.

"You can't tell me more than that?" Norah questioned and Avery hated seeing the hurt on Norah's face.

Shaking her head Avery frowned, "Not right now," she told her knowing what she left unsaid was maybe never.

Norah only nodded though the hurt look never left her face and silently, she stood up leaving Avery alone as she too went down the hall and all Avery could do once she was alone was let out a huge sigh.

Today had been trying and exhausting and she just wanted a nap. A really long fucking nap.

*****

Stretching some as she awoke from a nap she had meant to take Avery reached for her cell phone which was lying by her bed. Crinkling her forehead when she saw a text from Taylor.

 **T-bird 3:45**  
Just got off the phone with Zac. He told me about what happened. I'm sorry.

Rolling her eyes Avery couldn't help but wonder if Taylor was lying about being sorry. After all he'd told her numerous times she didn't need to like Zac. That Zac wasn't worthy and now they were arguing and shouldn't this be a wake up call to Avery? Shouldn't this prove what Taylor was saying?

 **Avery 5:19**  
Are you really sorry? Isn't this what you wanted? Me to be mad at Zac.

 **T-bird 5:24**  
No. I just wanted you to see that you can do better than Zac, not argue with him like this. Are you mad at me for this situation now too?

 **Avery 5:27**  
No I've just had a bad day. I'm sorry. Are you still going to Meg's party tonight?

 **T-bird 5:29**  
Yep. You wanna come with? I heard it's gonna have some good alcohol. Better than that cheap ass wine you love.

.

 **Avery 5:33**  
No I'm content staying home. I think I have seen your face enough in the last twenty-four hours

 **T-bird 5:36**  
So you won't mind if I have sex with Meg tonight?

Swallowing hard as she reread Taylor's last text over and over again Avery hated the jealousy that she felt bubbling underneath the surface. She had no reason to be that way. Taylor wasn't hers and he could have sex with whoever he wanted just like if she wanted to fool around with other boys she could.

Not that she would but she could.

 **Avery 5:45**  
You can do whoever or whatever you want. I don't care.

After sending that text she turned her phone off and slipped out of bed. She needed to shower and then find something to eat because she was hungry. She also needed to get her mind off Taylor fucking Meg.

It wasn't her business if he did nor was it her right to say no that he couldn't. He could fuck her tonight and she'd be fine with it.

*****

Sitting at the diner where she liked to go sometimes just to eat or even get away, Avery was hunched over her sketchpad, drawing just to get out pent up emotions. Emotions that revolved around both Hanson boys.

Hearing her phone alert her to a new text, she put down the pencil she was using and reached for it. Not sure why she was surprised to see it was a text from Taylor. She figured he'd be too busy fucking Meg.

 **T-bird 12:10**  
You know you look beautiful when you're spaced out and drawing. Also I didn't sleep with Meg. Left the party early and am sitting not too far from you.

Looking up from the text Avery raised an eyebrow as she saw Taylor a few tables down from her. His coffee mug raised up in a weird salute of sorts when he saw her looking at him.

Blushing slightly she looked back down at her phone and sent a text back to him.

 **Avery 12:16**  
You could have slept with her. I wouldn't have cared...also you're a creep.

 **T-bird 12:19**  
You wound me Pippi. Was I creep when you wanted to suck my cock? No...and I didn't want to sleep with her. I just said that to rile you up.

 **Avery 12:24**  
It didn't rile me up..I really didn't care..Leave me alone though..I'm trying to draw.

 **T-bird 12:26**  
As you wish...but at least make me cute...

Rolling her eyes Avery blushed again as she moved her phone away and stared at the unfinished picture she had been drawing of Taylor. A tiny part of her hating that somehow he knew or assumed.

He was so egotistical and she didn't find it a turn on at all. She really really didn't.

Nothing about Taylor turned her on or should have turned her on.


	11. Just Had A Taste I'm Already Wasted

After the truth about the blow job had came out, time for Avery seemed to go by in a blur. August turned into September and now September had lead into October. The smell of fall literally seemed to settle in the atmosphere.

It was a smell that Avery loved and Tess always said it was because they were fall babies but if that were the case then Tess should have loved fall too but she didn't. Tess had always been a summer girl. She had loved wearing cute dresses and short shorts and that was probably why Zac had wanted it to be her when it came to the blow job.

Because despite looking like her Tess had always and would always be the hot sister while Avery was plain and boring and normal. Not liking to dress as sexy as Tess did. Not wanting to change up her hairstyle as much as Tess did. Which speaking of new hairstyles Tess had just came home today with one.

She now had bangs and a bit of a shorter look. Her hair curled a bit too and it made her look even hotter than what she already was and Avery knew soon enough boys would be flocking to her. Not that it was any different.

Tess had been with two guys since things with Zac had fell through. Avery even hating to think about Zac right now because things were still strained between them. They were doing a good job at avoiding each other even in the classes that they shared together. The both of them seeming to stay on opposite sides of the classrooms and somehow the distance between them was killing Avery even if she was the one who had the most rights to be angry here.

It was weird not speaking to him when it was something that had been such a part of her life from childhood and she knew sooner or later she'd have to cave. Even if what she really wanted was Zac to cave first.

Hell it was Zac's fault she was even in her own head right now really. Had retreated there after coming home from class and seeing Tess' new hairdo. Mainly because during class she and Zac had been paired up as buddies for an art project. The people in the class being paired off in twos and out of each group one of them had to choose who would pose nude and the other person had to draw them.

Of course it was Avery's luck that the teacher had paired her with Zac. Both of them giving each other awkward looks from across the room after it had been announced they would be partners. 

Avery half hoping that Zac was as much into his own head as she was. Avery hoping that maybe he'd actually cave before their deadline so that it wouldn't be awkward or so that she wouldn't be forced to do it first but then again she wasn't dumb. She knew she'd be the one to cave.

It was always her who caved first when she argued with Zac.

Laying back against her bed Avery let out a long sigh almost wishing Taylor were here this weekend but he wasn't. He had left after classes today to go back home. Apparently Isaac wanted to meet with him and Taylor suspected it was to ask him to be his best man in his wedding because of course the oldest Hanson was getting married.

Isaac was engaged to Emma the girl he had been dating since his freshman year of college and their wedding was coming up. It was set for Valentine's Day and last weekend he had met with Zac. Told Zac he wanted him to be a groomsman, something Avery only knew because Taylor had told her.

All the news she got from Zac seemed to come from second hand sources now. Gage or Taylor and sometimes Norah or Tess but very rarely them. It was only them when they had seen Zac leave a party with a girl and Zac had been doing that a lot lately. Going to all the parties he could and leaving with a new girl.

It seemed once again now he was trying to be like Taylor. He had always claimed he wanted to be like Taylor and not be a man whore but that had been in high school before Natalie's breakup with Taylor and now Avery guessed after Zac had his whole idea or fantasy of Tess turned upside down he needed to be like the new Taylor.

The Taylor who slept around.

At least Avery supposed he was still sleeping around. They hadn't really talked about whether he was even though they were both still fooling around with each other. Neither doing more than just oral and of course Avery also gave him hand jobs as well and she wished sometimes that he'd use his hands on her but he hadn't.

It was like he was scared to do that for some reason and Avery was too chicken shit to broach the subject and ask him why. Even if she wasn't too chicken shit to suck his cock or beg to suck his cock because she still had moments were she begged to do that and of course after every time they fooled around Avery swore to herself it would never happen again.

It always happened again in the end.

Coming out of her thoughts when she felt her phone vibrating against her on the bed, Avery picked it up and swallowed hard as she saw Zac's name on her text notification alert. It felt odd since she hadn't had a text from him in months.

Taking a deep breath to prepare herself Avery clicked on the text to read it.

 **Zac 7:45**  
Hey, can we meet up at our diner to talk about the project?

Avery hated the annoyance she felt at Zac's text because of course it wasn't an apology text. She had really wanted it to be that but it was just a text from him asking to meet up and talk about the art project.

A project where one of them would see the other naked and how odd would that be? Not that it wouldn't be odd if things weren't strained because it would but this would be worse...and also how dare Zac still call that diner theirs. 

They hadn't hung out there in ages. Not even since before their falling out.

 **Avery 7:51**  
Is it really still our diner when we aren't speaking and haven't hung out there in ages?

 **Zac 7:54**  
Haha very funny. It will always be our place but can we please meet there to talk about the art project?

 **Avery 7:58**  
Just the art project?

After sending that last text, Avery hated the way she blushed because it almost seemed like she was begging him to broach the subject of their estrangement. Like she was begging him to apologize and she didn't want to beg him for anything, even if she was tired of always being the first to apologize.

 **Zac 8:02**  
Maybe we can talk about other things as well.

At his last text, Avery let out a sigh not sure if she believed him but she knew she had to at least agree to meet him or he wouldn't stop hounding her.

 **Avery 8:07**  
Fine. I'll meet you there in twenty.

After sending the text Avery slowly moved from her bed and walked to her mirror to at least fix her hair and make herself look somewhat presentable to go out in public after laying on her bed and stewing in her misery for what felt like hours.

Maybe after this meeting with Zac she'd text or call Taylor to see how he was doing. Though of course she wouldn't tell him about her crappy day. There was no way she wanted to explain that it had all started because of being paired with Zac in an art project where one of them had to draw the other nude.

She just had a weird feeling Taylor wouldn't take it well, which was crazy because they weren't dating and hell maybe her weird feeling was wrong. Maybe if she did tell him he'd just tease her but still she'd err on the side of caution and just not say anything.

*****

Arriving at the diner Avery slowly stepped inside of the place, her eyes looking around for Zac and when she did finally see him she wasn't surprised to see him in their usual booth. Just like she wasn't surprised to see he had already ordered food for the both of them too.

If she knew him it was probably what they always got. The pancakes with a side of bacon and sausage and to drink a chocolate shake for him and a vanilla one for her.

Taking a deep breath she walked to where he was, doing her best to forget the nerves that were beginning to bubble up inside of her but it was hard.

When she made it to where Zac was, Avery was almost relieved to see that she was right about what Zac had ordered. It seemed some things never changed even if things between them had now.

Even if this was one of the worst arguments they had ever had since being friends.

"Did you walk here?" Zac asked not even looking up at Avery and his words made Avery blush as she sat down across from him in the spot that had her vanilla shake and food. A small smile on her face when she saw the bacon was done up on the pancakes like a smiley face.

It was a sweet gesture and one that Zac had done before when she had been angry at him and while this didn't erase her being angry she still found it sweet. 

"Yeah," Avery nodded blushing as Zac finally looked at her a small glare on his face. "It was nice out and I wanted to enjoy the nice fall night."

"It's also getting dark Avie and anything could have happened to you," Zac retorted and Avery hated that he was scolding her like her father would have done.

"Nothing happened though, I'm fine," Avery told him as she took a drink of her shake to distract herself some. After she had swallowed she said more. "You're not my dad though so stop acting like it."

Zac let out a small sigh, "I know I'm not. I'm just..I worry about you Avie."

"Do you?" Avery asked as she eyed him briefly. "Because we haven't talked since August and you haven't called or anything to see how I am. I figured if you worry like you just said you would have checked up or something or apologized for your part in our argument."

"I know I was a dick okay," Zac said and Avery watched as he finally took a bite of his food and a long drink of his own shake and she knew just like she had used her drink as a distraction he was using his food and drink as one.

That was fine with her, she'd stay silent until he talked again.

"I'm sorry even if I still think what you said was wrong," Zac told her and his words surprised her. "Well I know they are wrong. I didn't just assume it was Tess because I didn't want it to be you."

Avery wanted to open her mouth and ask him why he assumed it was Tess but she didn't because maybe she didn't want the answer. Maybe having the answer would make things worse between them.

"And I'm sorry I snapped, I guess," Avery sighed as she finally took a few bites of her food. "I was just angry and I'd been holding that information in for years and I shouldn't have just let things bubble under the surface but I did. I did because I always wondered why you liked Tess and then knowing it just made me angry."

Zac paused at her words as he raised an eyebrow, "Why did it make you angry?" he asked her and really? Was he that dense that he didn't realize that Avery had feelings for him. That she'd blown him because she liked him.

"Because I liked you Zac," Avery said and she felt her blush come back and this time she was sure it reached her ears because they felt hot now too. "Why do you think I said it'd break my heart if you said I was nothing but a friend to you and that is why I never said anything before now?"

After she had spoken things between Avery and Zac went silent and both of them ate some more of their food in that silence as well as drinking their shakes and Avery guessed they both needed distractions now.

Avery had opened a can of worms and it seemed that was something new these past few months. She kept opening new ones with Taylor so why not keep up the tradition with Zac.

"And you don't like me anymore?" Zac questioned and there was a look on his face that Avery couldn't read. A look that she wished she could read.

Biting her lip Avery wasn't sure how to answer his question because right as she had been about to answer a picture of Taylor's face came to her mind. How he looked every time they fooled around then it transformed to how he looked when he came and it was enough to throw Avery off some.

"I don't know if I do," she shrugged knowing that was the only answer she could give him. "I think I do but our argument has changed things between us that I don't know if it can ever be the same."

Once again there was a look on Zac's face that Avery couldn't read and once again she wished she could read it. Almost wanted to ask him what was the matter but she didn't.

Zac finally nodded his head before she could say anything, like maybe he understood what she said even if she wasn't sure her reasons for things changing made sense. Because they didn't to her.

She knew she still liked Zac..even was sure she loved him too but there was this weird thing she had with Taylor. A thing she told herself had no strings or feelings involved but then his face had shown up in her brain before she had answered Zac's question on still loving him and that had to mean something.

Avery just wasn't sure what it meant.

"So about the art project," Zac started finally changing the subject and for that Avery was thankful. "I was thinking we could do it at my place on Wednesday. Gage has a date that night and he'll probably be gone until the next day if he gets laid which he probably will."

Avery made a face at the thought of Gage getting laid. It wasn't something she wanted to think about really because she couldn't ever see what anyone would see in him. He was Zac's annoying roommate.

Then again for all of her childhood she had thought of Taylor as Zac's annoying brother and now that seemed to be changing, so she guessed she could see why some girls would want to date or even fuck Gage. She was messing around with Taylor and really had no right in judging anyone.

"Wednesday works for me," Avery said knowing she was free that day. At least she was sure she was and that she had no plans with Taylor. "So...who is umm..." Avery started unable to even finish asking who was going to be the one to pose naked.

Her blush seeming to return for a third time now.

Zac only let out a small laugh and Avery saw a matching blush on his face and at least she figured he knew what she was about to ask.

"I was thinking it could be you," Zac said answering the question Avery never asked. "I mean you already saw me naked a few years back and maybe it is only fair that I get to see you naked now too."

Rolling her eyes Avery shook her head playfully, "You just want an excuse to see what Tess' body would have looked like," she retorted but there was no heat behind her words. Just teasing.

Zac blushed more, enough that Avery saw his ears turn red. "No," he said as he eyed her in a way that made her squirm some. "I just want to see what you look like naked," he told her and he sounded genuine and again she had to squirm. Feeling hot all over all of a sudden.

Instead of asking Zac why he wanted to see her naked Avery took another drink of her shake. Then once she had swallowed it she took a deep breath before nodding her head. "Okay," she told him with a small smile. "I'll be the one to pose nude," she agreed hating how nervous she was and hoping it didn't show.

She didn't want Zac to know how much the thought was affecting her or how much his words about wanting to see her naked had affected her too.

She was just being pathetic and none of this meant anything. She never had really meant anything romantic or sexual to Zac. Not like he had been her world for so damn long.

*****

"You didn't have to walk me home," Avery told Zac as they stood in front of the door of her apartment. "I could have made it myself."

"It's after dark Avie," Zac sighed as he came to a stop in front of her. "I was not going to let you walk home and live with the guilt if something happened to you," he said and again there he was acting like her father or a concerned brother.

Neither of the things she wanted for him to act like.

"Yeah, yeah," Avery muttered out as she moved some to open the door but before she could even turn the knob, Zac's hand was on her wrist and she turned back to him with a raised eyebrow.

She was a bit surprised to see a weird look on his face and before she could ask him what was wrong he was shaking his head like he knew she was about to speak.

"Please don't hate me for this Avie," Zac whispered as he inched closer to her. Avery feeling her heartbeat begin to quicken some. "But I really want to try this sober," he told her and again before she could speak up she was stopped by him but it wasn't by the shaking of his head.

Avery was stopped by his lips against her own lips in a kiss.

Feeling like her heart had slowed when she realized what was happening, Avery let her eyes fall shut as she kissed Zac back. Her lips opening of their own accord as she felt his tongue wanting entrance inside of her mouth.

Their tongues brushing against each other as the kiss deepened and she liked the chocolate taste of his mouth. It was much better than the alcohol taste the very first time they had kissed as teenagers in high school. So much better.

When Zac finally pulled away Avery caught her breath as she looked at him, their eyes locking and before he even opened his mouth she had a feeling of what he was about to say.

"Can I stay the night?" Zac asked confirming what Avery suspected he was going to ask. "Please," he added on as his forehead went to rest against hers. One of his hands soon coming to rest on her waist. "I kind of want to keep kissing you for even longer Avie."


	12. His Hands Are In My Hair, His Clothes Are In My Room

At Zac's request to stay longer, Avery's brain once again seemed to conjure up an image of Taylor. This one, one of him after the first time they kissed and the way he had looked above her in his bed.

The way she swore he had been kissing her with a purpose of something she still hadn't figured out yet and fuck...why was Taylor complicating things for her when he wasn't even here?

She really never should have let things continue with him after that first drunken time but every time she swore she'd stop giving into him and put a line between them it was like the line kept getting moved up. Like there was never even a line there at all between them and she had lied to herself.

"What will we tell Norah or Tess if they see us?" Avery asked making no effort to move from Zac's grip even with the flash she had of Taylor.

"That I'm just hanging out with my best friend," Zac answered like it was so easy to lie to them and Avery figured after all the lies she had already been telling that it should be but it wasn't.

Not when she felt like all she was doing anymore was lying. Lying to her friends and to herself and didn't someone deserve the truth soon?

Even with that last thought though, Avery knew she wasn't ready to tell any truths just yet so maybe that was what made her nod her head, "Yeah," she smiled as she chewed on her lip briefly as she made eye contact with Zac again. "You can come in and stay a bit longer," she told him and after she spoke his lips were on hers again.

Avery kissing him back feverishly as he pushed her up against the door of her apartment and she kept praying that Norah or Tess didn't open the door. The fall would hurt and the explaining wasn't something she was looking forward too.

Not to mention the fact that if one of them knew she knew word would spread amongst their friend group and she didn't want Taylor to find out about this. That she was making out with Zac.

Avery knew that she wasn't dating and Taylor and they were both allowed to do whatever they pleased but for some reason she just had a gut feeling he wouldn't like this. He wouldn't like knowing that her lips were smashed against Zac's right now.

Pulling away from the kiss breathlessly, Avery looked at Zac with a small smile, "We should head inside now," she told him softly before finally pulling out of his hold and heading inside. Almost feeling slightly relieved that neither Norah or Tess were anywhere in sight right now.

Once both she and Zac were inside, Avery reached for Zac's hand as she lead the way down to her bedroom and when they made it there it was Zac who shut the door behind them before turning to face Avery again and before either of them could say anything they were kissing again.

Avery leading the way to her bed and when she felt it at her legs she slowly fell back against the bed, pulling Zac down with her and not once did they break the kiss they were sharing.

A small moan slipping past Avery's mouth when she felt Zac's hand slip under her shirt, goosebumps forming on her skin at his touch.

His hand was rougher than Taylor's and it was a touch she'd have to get used too. Just like she needed to stop thinking of Taylor. Now was not the time.

Pulling away from the kiss long enough to remove her shirt, Avery felt her cheeks getting hot as she watched Zac's eyes move down to her bra. A plain white cotton bra that covered up her breasts.

Breasts that were by no means huge though Taylor never seemed to complain and before they began fooling around he'd had a reputation for being a boob man...and fuck. There she went again thinking of Taylor.

She really needed to stop doing that.

"You are beautiful," Zac spoke as he brought Avery out of her own head and her cheeks seemed to get hotter.

"You're just saying that because I'm shirtless beneath you," Avery retorted playfully and before she could say anything else, Zac's lips had attached to her neck where he began to kiss and suck on the skin there.

Another moan coming out of Avery at the action because his lips seemed to feel good anywhere on her body. He just had those kind of lips.

"No," Zac muttered out on her skin as he nipped some at it and Avery knew she'd have a mark there tomorrow. A mark she'd have to cover for a few days more than likely. "You are beautiful," he spoke again his hips moving down into hers and she could feel how hard he was.

He was hard and it was all her doing. Not Tess but her and somehow that gave her a thrill.

Avery could turn Zac on it seemed.

With that knowledge Avery moved her head and kissed Zac on the lips again. This kiss leading both of them to get even more undressed than before until they were both in their underwear.

Avery pulling away from him when she realized that. Her brown eyes locking with his and she knew in her gut she still wasn't ready for sex.

Not yet but maybe they could fool around like she did with Taylor and again she hated herself for thinking of him when she shouldn't be.

"I'm not...I don't think I'm ready to have sex yet," Avery whispered as she felt a blush coming to her cheeks again. One that seemed to grow the longer she and Zac held eye contact because she felt as if he reading into her very soul.

Seeing all the secrets she had except for maybe the one about Taylor. Hopefully not the one about Taylor.

"Are you a virgin?" Zac asked her so softly, one of his hands coming to rest on her cheek.

Swallowing hard Avery nodded her head not sure why she was so nervous to admit that to him. After all he was her best friend and now he knew almost all of her secrets except one. She really had no reason to be nervous with him.

Zac smiled at her head nod before moving down to leave a small kiss on her lips, "Then we can do other things," he told her as his hand slipped inside of her panties, rubbing at her wet flesh. "I'm never going to pressure you to do something you don't want too," he told her and his words reminded her of the night she had given him a blow job.

How he hadn't wanted to pressure her then either to do that even though it had been her idea.

"I know you wouldn't," Avery told him as she returned his smile finally and once again it was her kissing him, a small moan slipping out of her mouth as Zac began to rub at her wet flesh again.

His rough hands only making her more turned on than what she already was. Her body needing him to slip his fingers inside of her already.

"Need you to do more than just rub me," Avery spoke surprised at her own words and how demanding they sounded but obviously being with Taylor had taught her some things.

"I can do that," Zac told her and before Avery knew it, Zac had worked her panties off her, her hips only rising enough to help him remove them and soon enough he was between her legs. His mouth on her aching cunt and her eyes had fluttered closed at the feeling he was giving her.

While Taylor was incredible at this it seemed Zac was made for it. His lips and tongue were just made for oral sex and sadly as much as she hated thinking about Taylor she couldn't help comparing them and knowing that Zac was the better brother when it came to this. Even if he was shitty in not recognizing her feelings for him way before this year or even jumping to conclusions about who had given him a blow job.

If he kept this up and ate her out more than just tonight she was sure she could truly forgive him his faults. Forgive it by way of how amazing he was at oral sex.

*****

Laying tangled up next to Zac after both of them had gave each other orgasms, Avery looked up at him with a raised eyebrow, "Was Tess' mouth as amazing as you remembered it?" she asked him teasingly, watching as his cheeks turned a nice shade of red.

"Yeah," Zac nodded as a slow smirk built on his lips. "Your mouth was really good around my cock again," he told her and the way he said her instead of Tess. Instead of going through with her joke made Avery feel a heat in her belly again and the last thing she needed was to get turned on again.

Both she and Zac needed sleep. Avery not even caring how she'd explain it in the morning if Norah or Tess one saw Zac leaving her bedroom.

She half suspected that Norah would assume Zac was the secret person she had been meeting up with and at least she wouldn't be too far off. She'd be in the same family tree when it came to guesses.

"I'd almost think you had some practice since the last time you gave me a blow job," Zac continued and now it was Avery's turn to blush at his words.

"Would it be bad if I had, had practice?" she asked him not denying or confirming his words. She just wanted to hear what he had to say about her maybe fooling around with other boys since he was known to get jealous whenever she had even maybe gave googly eyes to boys when they were in high school.

Zac shrugged as he left a small kiss on Avery's forehead, "No," he told her though Avery swore she heard a small hint of jealousy in his tone. "Not when it made you a better cock sucker," he said and the way he said it, there was that heat in her belly again and before she could stop herself she let her hand wrap around his cock.

A smile working on her lips now as she felt his cock come alive again her hands.

"Is that all you like me for now?" Avery asked him teasing again. "My cock sucking ability."

"Not if you keep that up. I could also like you for your hand job abilities too," Zac retorted through a moan and his words caused Avery to laugh but she kept her hand moving on his cock. Her head moving up to kiss at his lips and as they kissed she let out a moan as his hand slipped in between her legs.

Two of his fingers slipping so easily inside of her wetness and she guessed that before they slept they'd use their fingers and hands to explore each other this time instead of their mouths.

Both things that Avery in no way objected too.


	13. And A Circus Ain't A Love Story

Waking to the sound of her phone ringing Avery let out a small groan as she opened her eyes. She knew it was too late though, there was no way she'd get her phone in time. 

In the end whoever was calling her she'd have to call them back.

Right after that thought crossed her mind she turned her head slowly to the space in the bed beside her. A space that Zac had been occupying last night after they had fooled around and she wasn't sure why she was hurt that he was gone. That he hadn't even spent the night fully and he had left before saying bye.

Avery guessed she was used to guys staying all night since when she was with Taylor nowadays he was with her all night. Then again they were always at his house so it wasn't like he could up and leave her. But still she had a feeling that if he had been the one in her bedroom that he would have stayed all night.

Shaking her head she sat up in bed, not wanting to think of Taylor though. Not after what she had done with Zac last night because in ways it made her feel guilty, which it shouldn't have. She wasn't dating Taylor and she could do whatever she wanted.

Reaching for her phone, Avery's eyebrow shot up as she saw that it was Taylor who had been trying to call her and she guessed just like she had thought of him, she was his first thoughts this morning too.

Before she could even second guess herself, Avery dialed Taylor's number back and put the phone to her ear. Listening as it rang twice before he answered.

"Hello Pippi," Taylor spoke entirely too chipper for morning. Then again he had probably already had coffee and was wide awake. "I was beginning to think you had slept through my call."

"I didn't," Avery told him with a roll of her eyes though he couldn't see her. "Why did you call though Tay?"

"Cause I missed the sound of your voice," Taylor said and his words made Avery feel something weird in her stomach. His words were also entirely too romantic for what they actually were. "Do I need a better reason than that."

"No," Avery said as she felt her cheeks getting hot with a blush. "I guess not."

Taylor laughed softly and again there was that weird feeling in her stomach, "Good because I don't have one. I just missed the sound of your voice," he said not even sounding ashamed at how romantic he sounded. "How was it without me last night?" he asked and Avery felt her cheeks growing hotter now.

Her mind instantly brought up images of Zac and what they had done. The guilt in her building and she had to bite her tongue to keep from telling everything just to clear her guilty mind. She knew she didn't have to tell him and she was afraid of telling him.

No matter how guilty she felt she was afraid of telling him and having him upset, which was absurd. There was no way he'd be upset.

He wasn't her boyfriend and she could do who and what she wanted. Then again he wasn't her boyfriend but he had called this morning just to hear her voice.

"It was alright," Avery told him surprised at the truth in her own words because she would have thought doing anything with Zac that was sexual would have been more than alright.

Yes, he was good at oral and his hands had felt nice between her legs but it was still just alright. Nothing she would write home about or anything.

"Did you miss me Pippi?"

"I didn't miss you calling me that."

"That doesn't answer my question. Did you miss me?"

"Yes," Avery admitted and again she was surprised by the truth in her words. She had missed Taylor even with everything she had done with Zac. 

That was the only excuse she had for all the times Taylor had made his way into her head last night when she had been with Zac.

"I missed you too," Taylor told her and though she couldn't see him she swore she heard a smile in his voice. "All through drinks with Isaac I was wishing you were there so we could be getting drunk and then I could take you back home to do dirty things with you."

Looking down at her covers Avery blushed again as she pictured all the dirty things she had done with Zac last night.

"There were no cute girls at the bar that you could have done that with?"

"What cute girls to get drunk and take back to Ike's to dirty things with?" Taylor asked sounding amused at the idea. "There were a few but they weren't the right girl."

"And what I am the right girl?" Avery asked him hating the way her heartbeat seemed to get faster after she asked that.

"You're the girl I wanted last night."

At his words Avery went silent and there was that guilt again as well as the urge to tell him about what happened with Zac. An urge she had to bite back.

Now wasn't the time to say anything.

"Oh," Avery muttered as if what he said was that simple but it didn't feel that simple. No, it felt heavy and messy and she wasn't sure how she felt about that.

"Yeah," Taylor mumbled softly like he knew her dilemma which was crazy because he couldn't. "I should go though. Isaac and I are going to go out to breakfast with Emma and one of her friends."

"Okay," Avery said nodding her head and she had to fight the urge to ask if the friend was a girl. The last thing she had the right to be was jealous after last night.

Also being jealous again was heavy and messy and she didn't want that.

"Talk to you later Avie," Taylor said and before Avery could reply back he had hung up and she moved the phone from her ear, just looking down at it briefly before shaking her head and laying it down beside her bed.

Slipping out of her bed she searched for the clothes she had taken off last night and put them back on before leaving her room, knowing she needed coffee before getting a shower and maybe once she had coffee she could make sense of all these confusing feelings inside of her.

Making it to the kitchen though she came to a stop when she found Zac and Norah both there, Norah seated in a seat at the table while Zac stood at their stove making eggs and bacon.

"Well look who just woke up," Norah said as she spotted Avery first and as they locked eyes Avery could see that Norah thought she had figured out the puzzle that was Avery's love life.

She had come to the conclusion that Zac was Avery's secret somehow even if she was disregarding the fact that her secrets started while Zac was still with Tess which made it impossible to be Zac.

"I told you she'd smell the food and wake up," Zac piped in as he turned to look at Avery and the smile he gave her was on that made her weak when it shouldn't. Not when she had just gotten off a phone call with Taylor that had made her feel confused about whatever the fuck they had.

"Oh yep, it was definitely the food," Avery said as she nodded her head deciding not to say the real reason. That she had woken up because Taylor had called and that woke her up.

She didn't feel like explaining or making up an excuse to Zac on why his brother would be calling her. After all he thought she still hated Taylor.

Things would be easier if she did.

"So where is Tess?" Avery asked as she sat down across from Norah at the table almost afraid to leave Zac standing at the stove by himself but he hadn't started a fire so far so maybe things would be okay.

"She didn't come home after work. Texted me and said she was spending the night with George," Norah answered and Avery guessed that made sense.

George was her newest boy toy. The third guy she'd been with since Zac, the other two having not lasted long and Avery almost wanted to run a bet on how long George would last.

At least Tess was thriving and back to her old self. The self who went through boys like they were running out of style or some shit.

If only she could be more like Tess then maybe she wouldn't be in this weird situation she had found herself in but she was and the last thing she wanted right now was to keep thinking about it.

Instead she would focus on the food Zac was fixing and maybe if she batted her eyelashes just right he'd fix coffee for her.

*****

"So you and Zac?" Norah questioned Avery as soon as Zac was gone. Both girls still not showered or dressed yet but at least they were full of food and Avery had coffee in her system.

"There is no me and Zac," Avery protested even though she knew what today had looked like. How he had been here all night and then when he had brought her food to her he had stolen a kiss on the lips.

Zac obviously not even caring that Norah was there and Avery had a sinking feeling this would get out to their friend group soon and soon enough Taylor would know what she'd done. He'd know and things would be awkward and over between them.

Avery hated to admit that she didn't want things to be over, no matter how many times she told herself she had to stop after a hook up with Taylor. There was just something about him her body craved and something she still needed.

"Really because it seemed that way to me," Norah spoke bringing Avery out of her head. "He kissed you and he spent the night," she said an accusation in her last words. "I highly doubt you guys were keeping things PG rated in your bedroom."

Blushing Avery shook her head, "We didn't but that doesn't mean there is a Zac and I."

"So why isn't there a you and Zac?" Norah asked her with a questioning look written all over her face.

"Well for one we didn't talk about what we are," Avery answered with a shrug. "And you know, I still have that other person who has been my secret for a while now," she said bringing up Taylor without saying his name.

It wasn't like Norah knew it was Taylor anyway.

Norah nodded her head though she still had a questioning look on her face. "So Zac wasn't your secret person?"

"No," Avery said with a shake of her head. "How could he be when one of the nights I stayed out all night was the night that he and Tess had the argument about the blow job?" she asked with a sigh. "Zac isn't my secret person."

"Damn Avie," Norah said with a laugh. "And here I thought Tess had a dramatic love life."

"It must run in the family," Avery sighed as she let her head rest against Norah's shoulder. "What the hell am I going to do?" she asked because right now she felt like she needed advice from her best friend.

Her girl best friend, not her guy one because he was a part of her problem...had been a part of it for so long now.

"What do you want to do Avery?"

"What do you mean, what do I want?"

"I mean do you want to keep your secret person too or do you want to let them go now that you have Zac? Or are you going to let the chance to have Zac slip through your fingers?"

Avery went silent at all that Norah had asked her, not even sure what she'd say to any of them because truly she didn't know the answers just yet or maybe she did. She knew she wanted to keep Taylor and didn't want to lose him and she also knew she liked whatever she had with Zac because she had always wanted that.

Though even keeping them both wasn't an option she could do in the long term. But maybe right now having them both wouldn't be so bad. Even if that made her an awful person.

"I think I want to keep my secret person too as awful as that makes me," Avery confessed softly hating that she did feel awful.

This decision would just lead to more secrets and she wanted to stop keeping secrets. She really and truly did.

"Then be honest with both of them. With Zac and whoever this other person is and tell them it's a no strings thing," Norah said as if it was that simple but Avery knew it wasn't.

She knew everything with Zac would always have strings with how long she had liked him and this thing with Taylor it had strings too no matter how much she wished they hadn't developed. They had and strings were there and somehow this whole thing was what she didn't want.

Everything was messy and heavy.


End file.
